Not Me (2021)

enemies to lovers, secret identity, identical twins, good boy/bad boy

(Thailand, Jan-March 2022 on YouTube)

Starring very established holy trinity pair, OffGun in possibly their final BL. Also Mond (Water Boyy), First (The Shipper), Gawin (Dark Blue Kiss), Puimek (SOTUS S), Gigie (2gether)

Another one that is joining the growing cornucopia of shows that I’m not sure I should really review as a BL fan, because I’n not not sure they’re really BL. (For me, Manner of Death really started this trend and dialogue with myself. I see Not Me as its successor.) GMMTV gave us a dark disestablishment narrative (in a time of civil unrest) with established queer award-winning director Anucha and starring OffGun.

Let Me Be Perfectly Clear

THIS IS AN AMAZING THING to get to experience in the BL world - nerve racking but remarkable. The politics of it rather overshadowed the art (just like for Dan’s character) and certainly overshadowed the romances. But the dialogue it generated was cool. This is the dark, gritty gang-set BL series we all expected from Motorcycle (before it disappeared from the radar) with some supped up soap opera tropes (twins, secret identity) and some crazy talent behind the wheel.

But was it ACTUALLY BL?

Not Me had a lot of BL elements, but in the end that’s not what the show was about, or even what it was genuinely trying to be as a show. (A BL series MUST use the main relationship arc as the plot driver.)

In fact that’s an issue I have with it. What was this show ultimately about? What did it want us to take away? Because as a piece of queer cinema and activism it was fine, but VERY heavy handed and clumsy. I can’t rec it to my cray queer artist or film industry friends they’d find it laughable, but I can’t really rec it to my BL friends either, it’s a lot for the sweetness-and-light crowd to swallow. Who was this for? What market? A few of us in this one corner of Tumblr? But who else? Netflix isn’t going to pick this one up, that’s for darn sure. And does that ultimately matter critically? (I think yes actually, because it won’t be profitable without an audience. But that’s an issue arthouse cinema has struggled with for a very long time.)

I DO think Not Me will have impact on BL as a genre going forward. Whether it technically belongs to it or not.

This is a lot of waffling from me, already a champion waffler.

Oddly, some of this is because I feel a lot about this show as I did about Bad Buddy. (Let me be clear: Bad Buddy was definitely a BL.) I appreciate both for the same reasons. And I will not be re-watching them often, if at all, for the same reasons. And that’s why I am not able to give either show a 10/10. Rewatch value is a huge deal for me.

So I’m going to say, 9/10. Just as a rating. Let’s move on from numbers and just talk more about this show.

Production Values Assessment

If I have one major critique of Not Me it’s that far too many scenes were filmed too dark. I get that we are meant to take this show super seriously, but when will filmmakers learn that serious doesn’t have to be executed by forcing us to squint? Metonymy has a lot to answer for.

Otherwise the staging, music, and all production values were high, if not pristine. It was closest to 3 Will Be Free or A Tale of Thousand Stars (which also had the darkness issue) than anything else from GMMTV.

Style and filming it matched to the best that Taiwan can do, so not as high quality as Korea or Japan, but then neither of those cinematic styles would have suited this narrative. But for Thailand, we can consider this top tear.

Story, Characters & Pairs

If you go in expecting this to be BL then the pacing is off on the romance arcs (but not the rest of the narrative). They’re rushed and uneven (like a Korean BL). For example Dan crying suddenly was... odd and jarring. The first SeanWhite kiss came outta nowhere. However, this was definitely OffGun’s best kissing ever. It only took them 6 years the get here.

Like Bad Buddy, Not Me seems to be pretty explicitly and intentionally going against problematic narrative choices that prior GMMTV series made/highlighted - from consent, gay-for-you, husband/wife language, heterosexual dysmorphia and more. They made certain to have explicitly queer characters positively represented (not for comedy).

I loved Not Me’s queerness and grit. I liked that it dealt with things that other BLs (let alone Thai BLs) haven’t. And I was prepared to forgive it a lot because of this stance.

DanYok

For me the DanYok couple, despite limited screen time, outshone SeanWhite (as a PAIR). Their chemistry is superior in almost every regard. They were so well acted and I appreciated their story as a true representation of enemies-to-lovers. It delivered on ideology, class, and social position conflict in a much more humane way that ToddBlack. They had an excellent arc and ending, if, at times, their romance felt a bit rushed - the intensity and suddenness of it suited the narrative and the characters.

SeanWhite
OffGun did a fab job on a romance story that, to be fair, wasn’t much of one. But that’s because it also wasn’t the point or driver of the narrative. Them being comfortable boyfriends was great and this was very much a queer relationship.

But to have truly ended this show narratively full circle, it actually should have concluded with the White & Black scene.

But instead it ended on a BL moment, or, to be more precise, on an OffGun goodbye moment.

Do I think that ending was for us… for the fans? Yes, I really do.

Am I grateful? Yes, I really am.

It’s been a wild ride.

Do I think you should watch Not Me? Yeah. Yeah I really do.

Read More

Legendary. You can't change society, but at least, you can start somewhere.

This series is so well-written, I won't be able to wrap my head around it. It is unique and finally, a series that is trying to show struggles in a real more honest way. There is a lot of issues that are brought up in the series, in fact, l would consider this series a protest from all of the actors towards everything that Thailand has been going through. But, I won't get political. This series is very transparent and it was not afraid to go places. I really like how they are fighting for a cause, but at the same time, they support the other causes. You know? like let's fight the corrupt system, but also, let's fight for LGBTQ+ rights. We stan. Alright, let's get to the gay part (lol). The writing of the characters is amazing. And yes, Off and Gun characters were amazing, but Gawin and Fluke? they ate. There is a lot of struggles in these characters that I really liked. And the fact that is well fleshed out. It is not a cookiecutter series, dealing with the struggles was a highlight. Most bls would give you a big struggle and then just give you two seconds of problem-solving. This series did not do that and for that, I am loving it. A lot of scenes that could have gone wrong but didn't. Such as the opening scene of one of the episodes that had Sean and White having sex, and Yok drawing Dan, these scenes could have gone the wrong way, but it didn't and I am so happy about it.

Visit my blog to read the full review of the series!

https://souvenirmyshyyange.wixsite.com/website/post/not-me-review

Read More

10/10 A STAND OUT lgbt drama with solid social commentary

(spoiler free untill u see the warning at the end) this is my first thai drama and first lgbt asian drama (or bl). i speak as someone who is lgbt and has now watched other lgbt, bl, and thai dramas.
REVIEW 10/10:
i loved this show so much. i really appreciated the social commentary, the activism, and the values of anti capitalism. as well as recognizing corruption in the system. the queer and political portrayals here are braver and more sincere than most western (and non bl) media i’ve experienced. from my understanding this is not very high budget but that’s mostly unnoticeable imo.
STORY 9.5: genuinely just love it,,, this is very unique in its genere imo because it feels like the story is first and the romance is just a natural part of it. the plot is not just there to serve the ships. not much to critique story wise. i would absolutely die for a season 2 to see the aftermath (see end of review). but i think the pacing was pretty solid, and the character and relationship development is pretty perfect.
ACTING/CAST 9.5: starting this out by saying Gun was the stand out performance here. absolutely served playing these two roles. offgun delivered a sweet and compelling chemistry to this project. everyones acting was quite strong in this. even the smaller roles like Eugene and Namo.
MUSIC 8: solid but not something i remember much of
REWATCH VALUE 10: i will 100% be rewatching
end of my spoiler free review !!! <3

ENDING SPOILERS SPOILERS!!:
ok so i did like the ending but i do feel it could have used an extra episode or 2. danyok got back together WAY too fast imo. i know why dan did what he did but he never even explains his reasoning before yok takes him back. i also wish we could’ve learend a big more about tod and blacks relationship? i think a season 2 focusing on the repercussions and court process would be amazing. this show has so much potential left and i hope gmmtv takes advantage of it.

Read More

I'm obsessed!!!

I really love OffGun's chemistry and was excited to see their new project together. I was pleasantly surprised when I was coming back every week to watch it for the excitement of the story and not just for their chemistry (which was still absolutely amazing btw defo the cherry on top). The second couple DanYok, which I haven't seen these actors together before (don't know if they were in another drama together) their chemistry was off the roof. I really loved how their story was real, mistakes were made, feelings were hurt but isn't that with all relationships? I loved their development.
Anyways onto SeanWhite (OffGun). The story of White going undercover in his identical twins life, Black to discover who put him in a coma really kept me on my toes. To me it was quite obvious who beat Black up but it was still portrayed in a really good way. This was definitely a slow burn/ enemies to lovers (I LOVE THAT) as Sean and Black do not get along, so White acting as Black made both of them butt heads at the start but alas they get their happy ending.
This covered some really heavy topics as well, not just your fluff action you get in other BL's, this portrayed fighting for rights of those who get discriminated against and holding those high in power accountable for breaking the rules. Sean, Gram, Yok, Tod and Black (well White) are apart of a 'rebel' group which try to expose these people by doing various stunts to gain social awareness and to put a stop to their illegal businesses. All the people in the group have good story for why they are doing this so it really brings the watcher more joy when they succeed in their little adventures.
Overall, amazing show, really eye-opening and the romance was absolutely amazing, not too much where is dilutes the action of the story but enough to be screaming internally when watching the cute moments (and trust me there is a lot)

Read More

Almost a masterpiece

Not me has so much positive things, omg. First, the direction of the scenes, the OST, the development of the main characters, everything is well done. The topics addressed are important for today's society and they deal very well with the topics. There are also symbologies in some scenes that makes everything so poetic.

The couples are also good. First OffGun, as always, had an amazing chemistry together and their acting were on point. I've known them since Theory of Love and for me they just outdo themselves. I also loved both characters, Sean and White/Black. Their scenes were beautiful. But for me, YokDan were scene stealers in a lot of moments. FIRST WAS JUST AMAZING!! He threw himself completely into the character and it didn't even feel like he was playing a character. Everything felt so true. And oh my god, YokDan scenes were perfect! The relationship of an activist and a policeman, the morals of both characters and how they handled things was perfect. The scene when Yok draws Dan, it was a symbology and a clear reference to the painting of Lucifer being expelled from heaven, and it blowed my mind how they even thought about doing this because if fit so well with the characters, it was just amazing. I also loved how this couple revolved around art, it made all their scenes look extremely poetic to me. And honestly, if OffGun weren't the main leads, First and Gawin would have stolen the scene completely and would have outshined the main leads from the series.

Now talking about the things I didn't liked that much, its a few things but yeah. The relationship of Gram and Eugene seemed so forced. I didn't feel chemistry between them at all and they were just flat. Its funny because I shipped Gram with EVERYONE but Eugene lol. Todd`s ending was so cringe to me lol I actually thought it was a little strange that nobody died in this series because they were dealing with heavy topics and strong people so the ending it was kind of...too light I think.

Also, 14 episodes felt short...episode 13 and 14 seemed SO RUSHED. YokDan`s scene was beautiful but like...a little abrupt. Dan just said sorry, Yok punched him and thats it? lol We should have seen Dan's perspective about things, him leaving the police and a little more of a conversation about everything that happened. I know this couple doesn't need necessarily to speak because both of them have THAT CHEMISTRY but come on, Dan betrayed them and Yok almost died. So yeah, I wish we had more scenes to give a perfect ending for them, as they deserved. But I have to say..even with this unsatisfactory ending, they stole the show in the last episode. A lot of people were disappointed about the politic thing but for me it was fine and even realistic. They will have to fight for a long time because the problem is in the system so the open ending seemed right. But I do agree that maybe we could have seen more things about Tawi and stuff.

So yeah, for me Not me it was.a big and satisfying surprise and unfortunately a little underrated. But I do hope people will give a chance and watch because its really deserving!

Read More

Its a MASTERPIECE ✨

Hi its my first time writing a review, I'm sorry in advance if my English is bad.

I just wanna say that this series is a Masterpiece. When I was watching it I didn't feel bored nor skipped some scenes, I didn't even know that I was already watching the last episode.

I really thought there was something going on between GRAM AND BLACK then I was wrong. GMM you fooled me😭.

I like this story because it set a new standard in bl industry its not like other bl's genre.

STORY- 10/10
The story was beautiful because it also focuses in LGBTQ+. And its not like other story that if you've fallin in love with a boy you will deny it.

ACTING/CAST- 10/10
Salute to GUN ATTHAPHAN for portaying WHITE/BLACK. You can differentiate them apart. He nailed his roles. He's really a versatile actor. I think nobody suited to play this role except for Gun.

Off Jumpol portaying SEAN was so freaking good. I really liked his Character.

And also to some actors they did great. They nailed their roles.

MUSIC-10/10
Their background music is beautiful. I loved it.

REWATCH VALUE-10/10
I'm always rewatching this series everytime I miss the cast. Please GMM TV I want this series to have a season 2🥺.

Read More

"Dura Lex, Sed Lex."

Cassandra Clare's books were the ones that introduced me to this term, popularly known as the Brocard Law, which when translated from Latin means "The Law is harsh, but it is the Law." Thankfully, she found a strong counterpart against this which is the family motto of the Blackthorns: "A bad law is no law."

Not Me reminded me a lot about this. If you are looking for romance in particular, then this drama might not be for you as it deals more with politics and justice than with love.

It delves into the depth of the social injustice faced by humans in the hands of law and the higher officials. Personally, I did not find it as 'dark' as viewers had said. Moreover, it brought forth certain shady topics that one would not dare to openly do so in a country. I applaud the production team and the whole crew for their bravery in putting this forward.

Four university students who work part time in a motorcycle garage decide to push the limits of law and commit acts of delinquence in order to shine light on the illegal activities being done by the major influential personalities, with businessman and politician, Tawei as their main target. When Black, their ringleader gets beaten to the point of unconsciousness, he is replaced by his more capable and refined twin White, whose existence is hidden as a result of his parents divorce.
As he seeks too find the culprit who caused his brother's injuries with the help of their mutual friend Todd while on incognito mode, White slowly starts to realize that Black was not whom he had known many years ago.

First and foremost, Thai dramas are literally the only ones listed on MDL where I feel genuinely like a useless pile of snack wrappers while watching them. All the characters are students who are passionate about their studies and what they do —- may it be Political Science, Law, Art or even Dance.
They really work hard to study and knows very well the consequences of their actions, right upto the years they would be sentenced to, once they are caught. They are purposeful and know their cause, fight for their rights and want their voices to be heard.
Issues such as LGBTQ+ rights and the loopholes of the Law of Impunity are discussed in detail and for once, I sat down to actually listen instead of fastforwarding. I aspire to be even as half as brave as them.

The entire drama follows their chronicles. And they do it as a final resort since nobody would help them. They are not the bad guys, per se. I even rooted for them. I predicted the ending since the very beginning, so I was not let down by the final episode.

The cast was spectacular, particularly Gun Attaphan who played the dual role of Black and White. It was so well done that I'm convinced that these were two different individuals instead of the same person. Same goes for Sean and Yok. The actors practically made the characters alive. Minor supporting roles such as Eugene, Namo and Nuchi and their rapport with the main characters were interesting to watch. I did not feel that any character was added in as a 'waste'.

The OST was beyond amazing and captured the essence of the drama perfectly. The opening song is so beautiful even without understanding what was being sung. (Not Me by Kang Songks.)

This was an experimental, yet a didactic experience for me. I thoroughly enjoyed every minute and would not mind rewatching it again.

Read More

New #1 BL

Never have I felt so down that I've come to the end of a series, and neither have I felt the need to write a review on a show just to let people know how much more this show deserves.
Despite the lack of budget, this show delivers in all aspects.
The focus of the entire series itself (politics, injustice) is just so extremely fresh in the BL industry that makes you doubt how interesting the story can get (imo politics are boring lol). But when such a genre of BL becomes so educational and lets the viewers understand more about the world, you know the director is amazing. The story goes deep into topics like monopoly and impunity and how it affects the society as a whole, and such a fresh take in the BL world really draws you in.
Not to mention, the casting for the characters is spectacular. You know nothing can really go wrong when Gun takes on the main role of Black/White, even though its hella challenging. This show really stretched him as he needed to show the stark difference in behaviours of the twins, and if you ask anybody that watched this masterpiece, they would all agree that Gun nailed his characters. I don't really have to say much about OffGun as a pairing because who doesn't know how good their chemistry is lol.
Moving on to DanYok/GawinFirst damn yall have no idea how hard they robbed my hearts. Every tiny bit they had in the show brought so much impact in the emotional aspect. Gawin did so well in showing his eternal dilemma of whether to follow the system, and First shattered all our hearts by displaying the yearning pain felt by Yok from seeing Dan betray him after putting in all his trust. Really didn't expect the chemistry of this pairing to be so phenomenal, would really like to see them act together again.
Now on to the music, I really didn't notice myself cringing at the background tracks and it shows how well P'Nuchy picked out the songs. Each track helped amplify the emotions felt by the viewer and didn't feel unnecessary (which happens rather often in BLs for some reason). The OSTs suited the show so much too (although the ending track sang by OffGun ruined my crying sessions after certain episodes LOL) Overall the music in the show is amazing.
THE CINEMATOGRAPHY. It reached a whole new level in the BL industry in a way that it perfectly conveys the characters' emotions. The 4Kness of many shots really embraced the idea of 'no filter' and I really sat through the scenes with content. It's just unexplainable. The rawness of the shots really showed how realistic this BL could get (in the aspect of both plot/love scenes).
In conclusion I'm so glad that I watched this show and I think I would have equally loved it even without the love aspect in it because IT REALLY DELIVERED. Would definitely rewatch it if im craving for tears or even just really good acting.

Read More

You're missing out on a GEM if you skip this, trust me

A beautiful story that comes from a cruel world.

The first time I read the summary and watched the trailer, I’m very skeptical about the theme and concept. Sometimes even the most basic themes of BL series (high school, college, family) failed at making things look realistic, LET ALONE a complex non-relatable story about gangsters and political drama. I’m worried that they might not be able pull this off.
But, boy was I wrong!

-----THE REVIEW-----
Not Me series has proven their quality in storytelling game in its own unique way.

A story told from the perspective of White, with his inner monologues and voice-over style narration, this series make it works like magic. The way they capture every moment, along with the acting, music, cinematography, and as I mentioned, the voice-over, everything somehow fall into place in a beautiful way to deliver both the right message and the right emotions.

STORY
The story surely is something fresh from the typical “everyday life” theme. At first, I thought it’s just gonna be about gangsters, violence, generic fight scenes, but it was definitely more than just that.

The main idea is about how we all live in the same planet, but most definitely not the same “world”. Life is unfair, yes, but things can change to make the world a better place, also a yes. But then where do we set the boundaries of creating those changes at the expense of lives? Where do we draw the line between our idealism and empathy? Not Me explores on how the characters deal with these questions.

The romance part of the story is very well written too. Despite all the political dramas going on, they show the journeys of character development, relationship development, while accepting and sharing their vulnerabilities and longing feelings that has never been addressed before.

ACTING/CHEMISTRY
I don’t have much to say about this, we all know how good Off & Gun are at delivering their characters, and how amazing their chemistry is.

But I do have to mention, that the MCs in this story are not easy to pull off, as they have very strong backgrounds and mindsets, and the 2 actors did amazing bringing them to life. Their eyes remind me of the sayings “eyes are the windows to the soul" with those silent scenes that speaks a thousand words and emotions just from the look in their eyes. Also, Gun did amazing portraying 2 very different twin brothers.

PRODUCTION
- The cinematography is to die for. I love good visuals (especially after watching ITSAY) and I don’t get how they make abandoned buildings, concrete walls, and rooftops, look both beautiful and melancholic at the same time.
- The editors deserve a raise for the amazing montages and of course, great music choices. The music fits all the shots and the feelings that the scenes are trying to convey.

OVERALL
- no cringy screenplay & editing
- no unlikely turn of events
- realistic relationship & character developments
- outstanding portrayal from the actors
- a solid story foundation
- beautiful shots and montages

In these 5 film aspects: story, screenplay, characterisation, acting/chemistry, cinematography, Not Me is mostly scoring high in all 5.

Read More

THE BEST BL OUT THERE FR

This show would have gotten a 10/10 for me if not for the loopholes here and there. For example, White's dad. I do not understand how White was gone for so long, and there was no attempt to reach out to his son. Also, I need to know who took a picture of the van that the gang was in when they got kidnapped. How did they know that people were being kidnapped? Also, I wish they could have fleshed out Todd's story a little more. I may just be slow, but I feel like some things were missing, especially in his encounters with both Black and White. Also, I wish we got more BlackWhite moments 🥲
Are these plotholes enough to make this show bad? Not in the slightest. Which show does not have loopholes, you know?
Unto the good stuff now.
1. I just need to commend Gun's acting. The way he pulled both Black and White had me believing that they were two different human beings. His voice, facial expressions, and demeanor all changed while alternating between both characters, and that was so impressive to see. He pulled off both roles so flawlessly, I'm still in awe of how great of an actor Gun Atthapan is.
2. Off's acting has greatly improved, and I am glad that I get to witness his growth as an actor. Off literally became Sean, and you can tell while watching him on screen. Every tear he shed, every word he said, every action that he took, was executed so meaningfully, and I am so proud of the actor he is today.
3. First did an amazing job portraying Yok. Every tear that man shed, I shed it with him and every time he smiled, I smiled along with him. He made me go through every emotion along with him, and that makes him an outstanding actor.
4. Mond, who played Gram, was so great with his facial expressions. Although I wish he got more screen time, he still did a great job while on screen.
5. Papang who played Gumpha was so great at being a mother bear. He took care of those kids so well, and I kinda cried sometimes because of how kind he was.
6. Todd was a hot villain. He slayed being manipulative.
Namo, Eugene, and Nuch also did such great jobs and I am glad that their characters had depth to it.
All in all, this was such a great show. It attacked very important social justice topics. I commend them, especially because I know how the government is in Thailand. They could received huge backlash for this show. The romance did not feel out of place at all. Everything was so seamless, from the pacing of the show to the editing. Fantastic job to all who were involved in Not Me! I hope to see another show from them.

Read More

could have been better

Maybe my expectations were too high after watching the trailer because I was not impressed at all. Gun's acting was really good, as always and the music was good too which are the the only good things from 'not me'.

The plot had potential but was really executed terribly. Talk about plotholes. It was clearly supposed to have a heavy plot but when something like that has plotholes, it becomes less enjoyable to me. The cast and bts people kept talking about how they didn't have a budget which is bad but how does that explain the writing? For example how they got saved from the bad guys, what was that? It is a no from me

Read More