MyDramaList MDLv6.6
Home→ General Forums→ Creativity Forum→

Poem: Moonchild

Dee

Moonchild


Even when I had heaps of work piled...
On the days of fast blowing wind...
And on the nights I cried...
When there was no one by my side...
With you being in my womb made me survive...

When the first time you looked at me and smiled...
That was moment all my pains died...
You will have to face the harshness of the world someday....
"So should you grow up to be kind?"
That thought was always on my mind...

Even after on my death bed I climbed...
Even after you were the one on which my old body relied...
There was still one thought on my mind...
"Should I find you a bride?"
After all in a mother son relationship we were tied...
As you were my moonchild...
As you were my moonchild...


All comments are welcome.

Quote
wtanya

I really like your poem!

Quote
emmagucci

Sooo... here's my very personal opinion on it

I'm honestly not a fan of the line ""Should I find you a bride?"" It's a bit of  an outdated  way of thinking, maybe that's why? But I like the poem overall. 

I also like those poems where the title kind of explains the meaning or sums up what is written later, but is never mentioned in the poem itself, know what I mean? Like  for example:

 It's like being
in the autumn
on the trees
the leaves 

And you might wonder what is it about. The tile of the poem is "Soldiers". 

 That's why I imagine her not finishing the sentence "As you were my mo-...", because it give the idea of her finishing her last breath while saying this poem (so it's her last thought, tragic...)  and it also makes the readers think "oh, it's moonchild!"

Quote

Recent Discussions

Hottest Discussions