Is "Stay With Me" a BL or a Bromance?

 ZhouYanRan:

Maggi64
We can't really compare Addicted and Stay With Me, although they are based on the same novel. Addicted was made in a different time, when the censorship wasn't as strict as it is today. Back then BLs were allowed and only explicit scenes were cut off (but one could easily find those scenes on the Internet). No one asks if Addicted is a BL or a bromance, because everyone knows it is a BL. With Stay With Me it's a matter of personal interpretation, some will see it as a bromance and some will see it as a BL.

Totally agree.  It's interesting that China has the strictest censorship  yet their BL's were the most sexually explicit back in 2016.  I mean, Gu Ha gives Bae Luo Yin a hand job in that one scene that was regarded as either rough sex or sexual assault, depending on how you look at it. But either way, it was explicit that he was reaching for BLY groin for a hand job. 

But the most explicit BL sex scene I've ever seen in ANY show was in the Chinese show "Like Love." There are multiple sex scenes (at least 3 that I can recall) in the show and all of them very naughty. You can see the guys totally naked while one mounts the other.  The only thing that's covered is the tiny area of their penises.  Otherwise, you see everything while they are having sex.  

If given ratings that we use in the USA,  "Like Love" would be an R rating.  That's significant because most BL's -- even the Thai ones with lots of sex scenes -- would be rated PG .  That's the rating given when the movie  has a sex scene that is mostly implied because the characters will still be clothed. You know,  it will show them lying down in the bed to have sex, and then the next scene will show them in bed after the act with the sheets covering them up to their shoulders. You'll see their  naked shoulders above the sheets, but that's it.  

 Conversely, a rated R movie  shows a man's full torso and bottom,  and a woman's breasts.  "Like Love" showed the guy's entire bodies except for the penis.  It's extraordinary that the most sexually explicit of all the BL's ever was from China!   Like Love had 2 seasons  and was supposed to have a Season 3 but --  just like Addicted -- it got canceled.  

Now the only thing China will allow are censored adaptations of BL novels and mangas.  But I still see some of them as BL's -- it's just that they are coded.   For instance, I interpreted all the codes in the show "Precise Shot" and they were pretty obvious too.  Those 2 boys were in love.  In fact, Viki now has "Precise Shot" and included it in their category for BL's.  Viki has also included "Advance Bravely"  in their BL category.  Some people commented that those shows should not be in Viki's BL category, but I agree with Viki's assessment.   Those shows depict 2 men who are obviously in love, so they are BL's.    I regard "Stay With Me" the same way.  I know that plenty of people do not regard it as BL, and that's why we are having this discussion to begin with!  lol

dragon

You asked why they did not "step it up" after ep 8, which was when it became clear that the boys were in love.   I agree that it would've been great if they had stepped it up . But the director/writer had already gone as far as they could with the codes telling us that it was more than friendship.  If they went even half an inch further then it would mean a flat-out confession and kissing  -- which, of course, they cannot do.   They can only give the viewer codes.   

But, hey, those codes are pretty damn strong.  Indeed, many are obvious.   For instance, Wu Bi saying, "Su Yu is mine."   That line had already gone so far to declaring love that the only things that could  step it up beyond it would be a confession and kiss. 

As for kissing, I have read on the show's page that the actor playing Mao Chong gave an interview wherein he said there will be a kiss in ep 20.  I find this odd because if they are going to go there with a kiss, then why bother making episodes 1-19  full of codes?  I mean, a kiss already defies China's ban on gay content in the media, so why not defy it with the entire show instead of waiting until a very late episode near the end?   

On the one hand, I have to believe there will be a kiss because the information came from someone actually in the show.  On the other hand,  I am not 100% convinced it's true because it doesn't make sense vis-a-vis the way the rest of the show took pains to relay the boys' love with codes. I wonder if somebody translated the actor's interview incorrectly.  Or, if he truly did say there will be a kiss, I wonder if he said that to tease viewers and boost ratings.  Well, we shall see in a couple of weeks. 

I realize you wanted an explanation that did not indicate censorship.  However indicating censorship is the ONLY way to explain their not being portrayed as fully boyfriends.   You are also asking how they'd behave inside their  world as if they were real people.  I think that if they were real people they might have delayed confessing to each other this long -- especially Su Yu, because he was not in love from the get-go the way Wu Bi was.  

However, by episode 16 we are seeing things that in real life would go further.    For instance, Su Yu's declaration that he will be with Wu Bi on every holiday  would have been, instead, Su Yu's confession that he loves him.    In "Addicted" Bae Luo Yi finally returned Gu Ha's love around the same time that the girlfriend showed up (she showed up in the very last episode, and was supposed to be in Season 2, but it was canceled).

In "Stay With Me" the boys came  very close to confessing their love around the same time the girlfriend showed up, but fell just a breath shy of it.   It's frustrating to watch because it's like getting one lick of ice cream, which is enough to wet your appetite, but then the full ice cream cone is yanked from you.   

At any rate, to your question about how they'd behave inside their own realm as real people, I think they'd have confessed and kissed by now. 

As for Su Yu's clothes, I did not notice it.  But now that you've mentioned it I will be aware of it.  Thanks!

Discussion is always welcomed, since it's impossible to find an objective answer to this post's question. It really depends on how explicit the relationship has to be in your eyes to classify it as a BL or where do you, as an individual, put the line between a BL and a bromance. There are quite a few in-between Chinese dramas, that can be seen as either one of the two. All adapted from BL novels, all reduced to encoding. Do I believe in all those dramas there's a love (true or toxic) between the two men? Yes. Do I consider all of them a BL? No. But that is just me.

 FreshKicks:

I'd also like to know what additionally they'd want to see in order to agree it's a BL. I can't remember another BL series that encoded m/m love into its production as thoroughly as this one has. Yes, other BLs have been more upfront with the character dialog saying "I like So-and-so" but the subtlety here in this series doesn't mean a failure to commit.

Totally agreeing with you. Some people need a full confession before they will say it's a BL, but it's been completely obvious to me that it's BL.

With C drama’s they won’t openly label it BL but as some have said - hints are dropped. Here are some lines from a flirty scene in episode 20-

WuBi-
I am exhausted for toiling for a day.
Why don't you help me stretch my muscles?
Then I'll help you stretch.
It's not like we haven't done it before.


-Then he puts him over his shoulders and carry’s him toward the bedroom

Apparently, this has the go-ahead for Season 2, and I was informed today that there will be a release of uncensored scenes, whether that pushes it over into traditional BL, who knows? Some uncut series just have added violence rather than romance, so it's a waiting game.