Gao Bing Zhu on the maximum and without drinking, or the story about two musketeers

I won't ask if everyone is alive after my previous review, because I don't want to repeat myself. :):):) Tell me better, how have you celebrated the winter holidays? Did everyone get presents? That was my reaction when I received gifts for Christmas and New Year :):):): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itvOi8ud8HY. Yes, I am prone to self-irony, unlike those who have no sense of humour at all.

Given how much I loved Qu Gao Wei and Zhou Yi Wei as actors, I decided to start the new year with a drama by one of them. From the Sui Dynasty I jumped to the Tang Dynasty. It looks like I'm already watching Chinese historical dramas in chronological order, according to the history. :) I should warn you right away that I watched the version of the series Judge Di's Mystery (or Judge Dee's Mystery) that contained thirty-two episodes. I wrote my review based on that version.

Since that scarecrow likes to steal the ideas, fame and even the height of other actors, as well as insult and use such wonderful ladies as me, the two musketeers Qu Gao Wei and Zhou Yi Wei have decided to rub his nose in it and kick his ass for it, so they mocked him by parodying him in their dramas. Qu Gao Wei did it in Romance on the Farm and Zhou Yi Wei — in Judge Di's Mystery.

However, their parodies turned out to be so much better than the original that that scarecrow itself became a parody of those their characters. In the eighteenth episode of Romance on the Farm, such a dandy entered the restaurant that I was even glued to the TV screen. And look at this photo from Judge Di's Mystery: https://mydramalist.com/photos/604oE0_3. It's the same Gao Bing Zhu from Feng Qi Luo Yang (Luoyang), only here he is tall, handsome, and most importantly, sober as a pane of glass. :):):) Well, and I won't even comment on this picture, everything is clear :): https://mydramalist.com/photos/w3d4p_4. And the Prince Dong Chuan from Feng Qi Luo Yang in Judge Di's Mystery has become an emperor, with which I congratulate Liu Duan Duan. What a great promotion! :):):) In addition, his character in Judge Di's Mystery got a moustache. :)

I'm glad that Zhou Yi Wei has listened to me and started acting in really cool dramas like this one. His hero in the show is like a Chinese Sherlock Holmes. I got the impression that before he starred in Judge Di's Mystery, Zhou Yi Wei watched all the seasons of the modern TV version of the Sherlock Holmes story, the BBC series Sherlock with Ben Cumberbatch in the lead role. :) I have watched that series, so I know what I'm talking about. Di Ren Jie also reminds me of Judge Dredd from the famous comic book. In my opinion, the best Judge Dredd was performed by Karl Urban in the 2012 film Dredd.

Thanks God, Di Ren Jie doesn't sleep in the coffin in the drama. He's a normal, mentally healthy man, albeit with his own quirks, but that's his speciality. I was particularly amused by the way he handed out pancakes to everyone in the tavern in the first episode. It's just a super feature. :):):) In the second episode, Di Ren Jie said that Heavens should not be blamed for human sins. This is a right observation. It is also true that Ma Rong has said in the same episode that Heaven helps good people.

The so-called Heavenly Fire in the series is the same fiction set up by people as the so-called Holy Fire in the Jerusalem temple on Orthodox Easter. Once again, the scoundrels are doing their dirty deeds under the guise of God. For the Orthodox fanatics, I would like to inform you that God does not perform miracles on a schedule. He Himself decides when, where and in what way to perform miracles, and He does not need a reason for it.

I liked how Di Ren Jie drove like a tank through Confucius' statements about women in the drama. Well done! You know, I have a lot of reasons to hate Xi Jinping, but there is one reason I especially hate him. It is that he is a terrible sexist, just like Confucius. That's why that scarecrow is so eager to get close to Xi, because they are soul mates. That scarecrow needs not a wife, but a slave who will earn money for him all his life, will not say unnecessary things and will look after him like a small child. And Sun Jian is looking for an infantile woman-child to control her like a father and monitor her every sneeze. But I'm not looking for a “baby” or a “daddy”, I'm looking for a strong and independent personality like me, because I'm not a “mummy” or a “child”, but a princess.

Watching the drama I enjoyed to solve the cases together with Judge Di, but in each case I guessed who the real criminal was earlier than he did... much earlier. :) Di Ren Jie and Heiyan in the series are like Harry Potter and Voldemort, Christ and the antichrist. I quickly guessed who Heiyan really was. There were enough clues in the drama from its very beginning. In the twenty-ninth episode, one character has said before his death a reasonable phrase that the way of Heavens is not wrong, it is human nature that is wrong. This is exactly what it is: human nature has been distorted by sin, God is not to blame. It's good that character of the series realised that in the end.

I liked the pairing of Di Ren Jie and Cao An. Their couple is the highlight of the whole series. By the way, Miss Cao has a fan in the drama that looks like Zhuge Liang's. :) To finish expressing my impressions of the protagonist of the drama, Judge Di, I dedicate to him two musical compositions from the British TV series Sherlock, which I have mentioned above, namely these compositions: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzCEIBaV1Es; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-hncC_s6XlM.  

The drama showed how the Empress Wu Zetian cared about ordinary people and the poor, giving everyone the opportunity to make it in life. That's what I wanted to see in a Chinese drama about Wu Mei Niang. That's who she really was, not the monster that male Chinese historians have made of her.  

The relationship between the Emperor and Wu Mei Niang in the drama reminds me of the relationship between Sultan Ahmed and Kösem Sultan in the Turkish historical series Muhteşem Yüzyıl: Kösem. I'm giving you a link to one of the posters for that series: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt4787028/mediaviewer/rm1146691072/?ref_=ttmi_mi_all_1035. Pay attention to who the main character Anastasia / Kösem is standing with at the very top (yes, I mean that four-legged one :).

And this is my favorite character from the Turkish TV series Muhteşem Yüzyıl (the prequel of Muhteşem Yüzyıl: Kösem), Şehzade Mustafa (the title “şehzade” means “prince”): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enhtxbQj2IY. “Mustafa” is my favorite male Arabic name. It means “chosen one”. Şehzade Mustafa has a Chinese counterpart. You'll recognize him if you will watch the sixty-fifth episode of the drama Tribes and Empires: Storm of Prophecy, scenes from 25:25 to 27:27 (here is the link to the episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjW_tkkZNZc). They are similar, aren't they? The two lions.

The whole drama Judge Di's Mystery consists of signs and clues from God. I'll start with the funniest one. In the second episode, Ma Rong painted two Christmas trees on her cheeks, and Hong Liang gave Di Ren Jie a branch of a green tree. In the third episode, Zhang Sun Qing walked with a cypress tree in his hand, which visually looked like a small Christmas tree. It was appropriate because I watched the drama during the Christmas and New Year holidays. :)

The numbers “3”, “4”, “12”, “25” and “30”, associated with God and His Son Jesus Christ, were mentioned again and again in the series. In the drama, I saw a rainbow again, just like in Be Your Own Light, Her World and some other Chinese dramas. And do you know what the real meaning of the rainbow is? It is an external, visible sign created by God after He has regretted destroying humanity with the Global Flood, which He used to testify to the non-recurrence of such a flood in the future. It is a sign of God's covenant with people that God will not send such a flood to the earth again. And God is still fulfilling His promise to this day. You can read more about this in the Bible (the Book of Genesis, chapter 9, verses 12-17).

In the series, as well as in Queen Dugu, the number “9” was constantly mentioned. Judge Di also investigated nine cases in the series. If you add all the numbers of 2025 together, you will also get the number “9”. Now guess what the age difference is between me and Qu Gao Wei? That's right, nine years. The number “7” is also often mentioned in the drama. According to numerology, the number “7” is my destiny number. In the drama, I also have seen the number “8”, which is Qu Gao Wei's destiny number. If you add together the date and month of his birth, you also get the number “8”. He is now forty-four years old, and I am thirty-five. Add the digits of our birthdays together. What number do you get? “8”. The number of our compatibility according to numerology is also “8”. I can go on, but I don't want to reveal all the secrets yet. :)

Let's move on. In the drama, I saw many statues of lions, two on each side, and the image of two lions standing opposite each other on the judges' robes. Zhang Sun Qing's mantle also had a lion on the front. The robes of some officials in the series featured two phoenixes standing opposite each other. During the period of watching the drama, I saw a lioness in a YouTube video (that video was not about wildlife :).

In the drama, I saw a lot of banners with the image of a tigress on the ships. The Black Tiger Gang is also mentioned in the series. Again, remember what I have written about a black tigress in my previous reviews. I am pleased to be mentioned in Chinese dramas. :):):) While watching the drama, I watched the Ukrainian news, and they showed two tigers in the circus — an orange and a white one. The plucked peacock and the goat are still pretending to be tigers. Yeah, such “tigers” as Sun Jian and that scarecrow really belong in the circus. :):):) And the series also mentioned deer, just like in The Legend of Hao Lan. We can't do without deer. :)

In Judge Di's Mystery, Jiangnan, Shandong and Hebei, which borders it, were again mentioned. The first episode mentions the Ashina tribe. There were characters in Queen Dugu who had the surname “Ashina” and were from the same tribe. The first episode also mentions a precious pearl. Remember what I have written about a precious pearl in my review of The Legend of Hao Lan.

Ma Rong in the series was able to throw stones as skilfully as Shen Nuo did in Romance on the Farm. The battle in the eighteenth episode between Qian Hao and Qiao Tai with Ma Rong reminded me of the final battle between Lu Yuan Tong and Feng Xi with Dong Yue in Twisted Fate of Love. And I was amused by the erotic pictures in the twelfth episode. As I understood it, that was ancient Chinese porn, ha-ha-ha. :):):)  

There was a male character in the drama called He Da Jing. He liked to drink wine every day and he also loved poetry. As a result, that character burned to death while being drunk in a fire in an entertainment house in the very first episode. That's what he deserved. I don't feel sorry for him. I think you can all guess who his prototype is in real life. :)

The series featured a painter who had the same name as one Chinese actor — Xu Kai. That painter was killed at night with seven stab wounds to the body. The drama also featured a woman named Yin Lian, who was very similar in appearance to the Chinese actress Bai Lu. She was also killed at night with seven stab wounds to the body. This is a sign from God to those two Chinese actors I have mentioned. If they don't stop doing what they are doing, they will get the same end. And do you know who has killed those two characters in the drama? Someone like Xie Wei.

The story in the series about the ghost ship and what happened in the Tongkang village in the twenty-seventh episode reminded me of the 2002 horror film Ghost Ship. The scene in the drama when the ship with Judge Di and the others on the board went into the fog reminded me of the episode in The Chronicles of Narnia when the Dawn Treader went into the fog.

The moment in the eleventh episode when Di Ren Jie led the Yulin guards on the ship reminded me of the scene in the second Lord of the Rings film, The Two Towers, in which Aragorn led the elves in the Battle of Helm's Deep. And Mr. Hulu in the twenty-second episode reminded me of Gandalf.

The great ebb and flow of the tide in the twelfth episode reminded me of an episode in the Bible when the sea parted before Moses and the Hebrews to allow them to pass, and then surged and drowned the Egyptian pharaoh and his army who were pursuing them. I was also glad to hear the Korean language and the mention of Korea in the drama.

At the end of the eighteenth episode of the drama, the avenger hanged a lecher who had deceived a girl, causing her to become pregnant and later hang herself. The avenger is similar in appearance to Shen Nuo from Romance on the Farm. That scarecrow probably also hoped that I would commit suicide because of him, but to his regret and my happiness, I did not live up to his expectations. :):):) He only made me even angrier. You have to be a complete idiot to provoke a tigress by being a lousy goat. What suicide?! In 2022, when he was mocking me, I wished him death and all possible heavenly and earthly punishments. I also asked Heaven to avenge him for me, and Heaven heard me. In the twenty-third episode of Judge Di's Mystery, I heard a very good and reasonable phrase that I had also heard in two previous Chinese dramas I had watched: “as long as you are alive, there is hope in everything”.

I disagreed with some of Judge Di's conclusions and decisions. People who work in the field of law often have a professional deformation, and they begin to think that the law is perfect and should be applied equally in all cases. But this is not so. Laws are imperfect and often unfair because they are written by imperfect, sinful people, so a judge needs to decide each case on a case-by-case basis, taking into account all the objective and subjective circumstances. I will tell you the terrible truth, but sometimes you need to judge more by conscience than by law.

Therefore, in my opinion, judges should be living people with a human mind and a living soul, not soulless robots with artificial intelligence, as is currently practiced in the PRC in the courts of first instance. Fortunately, apart from human judgement, there is God's judgement, which, unlike human judgement, is perfect. The manifestation of God's judgement is shown in the drama. That avenger was not chasing Di Ren Jie all over the desert for nothing: he was trying to show him that. Unfortunately, Di Ren Jie didn't understand it then. But he understood later…

The cast of Judge Di's Mystery is just gorgeous. Whoever you point the finger at is a masterpiece. But there is one exception. I don't understand what that spy Zhong Chu Xi has forgotten among such great actors. She is so fond of acting with that scarecrow in such lowbrow movies as Youth and 1921. Another one of his mistresses. And in Judge Di's Mystery, she acted her role lousy. The Empress Wu Zetian is the same majestic and dangerous predator as I am, but Zhong Chu Xi has made her look like a shrivelled-up pussycat with her horrible performance. Not only did she ruin one of my favourite figures in Chinese history, but also spoiled my favourite epoch in the history of China. And in terms of her physical appearance, she doesn't fit the role of Wu Zetian, because she has the look of a simple grey mouse.

Zhong Chu Xi looked especially pathetic against Wang Li Kun. In simple terms, Wang Li Kun just smeared her on the wall with her unrivalled acting. Zhong Chu Xi is the biggest flaw in this drama. It was a big mistake to cast her as Wu Zetian. In order for Zhong Chu Xi to understand what her character is supposed to be like in Judge Di's Mystery, I advise her to listen to the following two my favourite songs from the drama The Empress of China: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IVT0MtfVQ1Q; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMwh1yCVxzg.

Yeah, no one can perform the Empress Wu Zetian better than me and Fan Bing Bing. :) To be honest, I'm even tougher than her. Compared to me, Wu Zetian is like Little Red Riding Hood. :):):) In your free time, I advise you to listen to Mustafa Sandal's song All My Life. This song is about me from its first word to the last. You will even be surprised when you listen to it.

I downgraded the series solely because of Zhong Chu Xi and her poor performance in it. But I have liked the drama and am looking forward to its second season. As you can probably already guess, Feng Qi Luo Yang is just a parody of Judge Di's Mystery, and a cheap parody at that. At last, three years after I watched the parody, I watched the original. To the big friends and mistresses of that scarecrow like Zhong Chu Xi, who brazenly climb into good dramas to the lead roles, I want to say the following: I will capture all of you, rascals, and verbally beat you so that you will not dare to stick your nose out in public.

That scarecrow thought I was playing games with him. But I have long since warned him that I know who he really is. It's not a game, but a war, and I'm going to win it. The war I am waging against him can be reflected in the following musical composition from Muhteşem Yüzyıl: Kösem: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZCCT2jauF8.

You know, I've been wanting for a long time to see Qu Gao Wei and Zhou Yi Wei in one drama in the lead roles. Imagine those two macho men in one drama. It would be a mega-bomb... a mega-bomb for women's hearts. It's called “to see and die”. :) Then even I would start to melt like cheese in a frying pan from such amount of courage, male strength and masculinity that those two cool dudes radiate together. :):):)

You need to throw out all the unnecessary men from Tribes and Empires and leave only two for the new drama: “Muru Han Shan” and “Shuo Feng He Ye”. Let Wen De Guang direct this drama, Cao Dun be the cinematographer, and Jin Yuan Yuan must be hired as a scriptwriter... well, or me. :) And the empress in this drama should be acted by Wang Li Kun. I can already see in front of me the poster for this drama: they are standing opposite each other in military armour, and below it is written: “Godzilla vs. Kong. Part 25. The Chinese version”. :):):)

You can choose for yourself who is who, but in my opinion, Zhou Yi Wei is more like Kong. :) But no matter who those two “cupcakes” think they are — Godzilla or Kong, they shouldn't forget that I am the main predator here, and they are mice, because I am the Lioness Queen. :) Honestly, I'm ready to watch their confrontation for more than one season of such drama. :):):)

To my next review, I am giving Qu Gao Wei and Zhou Yi Wei the task of singing the following songs for me: 1. Amr Diab — Nour El Ein. 2. Modern Talking — No Face, No Name, No Number. 3. Modern Talking ft. Eric Singleton — You Are Not Alone. 4. Modern Talking ft. Eric Singleton — China In Her Eyes. Gao Wei and Yi Wei really look like those guys from Modern Talking. And Eric Singleton obviously performed the role of Jesus Christ in those songs. :) As you can probably guess, all of these songs are about me. However, the last song is dedicated not only to me (although no one will deny that I have China in my eyes), but also to the entire female cast of Judge Di's Mystery, except for Zhong Chu Xi.

And while those two “Zorro” are trying to sing at least some of those songs for me, I dedicate to Christ and myself the song Chiki Chiki by Dr. Alban feat Starclub. And I thank Him for opening my eyes to everything and continuing to do so. This my review has turned out to be too hot for the beginning of the year, hasn't it? :):):) However, I have warned you that this will be my year.

P.S. Qu Gao Wei perfectly has showed in the twenty-third episode of Romance on the Farm how stupid that scarecrow likes to pretend to be in public. However, Qu Gao Wei was better at it. I was laughing so hard at that moment that I almost burst my stomach. And Shen Nuo is a real terminator. No matter how many times Wu Zhong Lian poked him with a sword, it didn't work. But Shen Nuo finished off Wu Zhong Lian with one punch, ha-ha-ha. :):):) You know, in some ways I'm even more like Shen Nuo than Man Er, because I'm just as ambitious as he is: my goal is not only “Wu Zhong Lian”, but also “the Marquis Ningyuan”.