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Dark side of K-dramas?

Rose

Is it just me or does anyone else think the K-drama characters are abusive?

First of all, don't get me wrong I love K-dramas, always have and always will but one thing I can't stand about them are some of the scenes.

Take for example: Wrist grabbing and forced kisses. We often see that in Korean dramas but that's straight up not okay and what pisses me off the most is how these abusive scenes are portrayed as "romantic"

And has anyone realized that most of the "relationships" in K-dramas are unhealthy af but the girl still stays with the guy and he eventually starts to "change". Like honestly wtf

It teaches girls that even if the guy treats us bad we should wait for him because he'll slowly start to change, major bs btw.

Honestly I know I seem like a feminazi going on a rant but last night I was watching "Goong" and I started to realize how unhealthy the relationship is, he constantly puts her down and makes her cry but as Shin says "I'm sorry" she forgives him and forgets about all the crap he's done to her. Also she has someone really nice and caring by her side who can give her a healthy relationship and treats her with respect yet she still stays with Shin because he's "changed"

I was reading a comment on a scene where the guy straight up pushes the girl against the wall and kisses her while she's struggling and the commenter wrote "I wish a guy would do that to me, romantic." (I'm not kidding) girls need to stop thinking these types of behaviors are romantic when theyre nothing but bad.

Anyways TL;DR I just think that dramas need to stop with the unhealthy relationships and the abuse portrayed as "love".

Leave your opinions, I'm just glad I got that off of my chest.

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Anastasia
Hey Rose. I respect your opinion and i want to tell you that i never though that way.. first about that kissing scenes. when i first saw a korean drama it surpised me positively but then i get used to it.. i think that is why dramas are "special" and that is why it's called dramas.it's just a story and nothing else. (i hope you understand what i want to say). i think that in real life too there are situations like these, the man graps the woman and then kiss.. and now about that unhealthy relationship.. in real life relationships aren't easy too. they are dificult and there is one who hurts the other but in korean dramas there is always the bad guy and the good girl who wants to change him and tries hard for that. although there are many dramas that there is a good guy who falls in love with the girl but there are other problems in their relationship. i really enjoy watching dramas but yes some times i think that they overeacting in some point. and i don't know if you ever saw american movies or tv series but i think that they overeacting there too. just remember that dramas/tv series and movies are just stories that are there to entertain us.
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Chelsey
Hey Rose, I totally agree with you. I love k-dramas too but even after watching many, I still get shocked at the abusive behaviour.

-The romantic wrist grabbing annoys me, it actually hurts and to me it shows a lack of respect towards the woman. However I do see how it started to show the desperation of the lead guy to grab her attention, but its been completely overused with romantic overtones. 

-Stalking is also creepy. There is so much stalking of the women in k-drama, guys following them home, keeping an eye on them all the time. I get that in most drama context it is romantic and not shocking. But let's be honest if this happened in real life, especially from a guy you didn't like or know, you'd probably call the cops.

-One of the worst I've seen is slapping where she fell to the floor. Arguably it was supposed to be shocking and not romantic as it was from her boss, but I was so shocked and disgusted I wanted to quit the whole drama. And even the male lead was evil and abusive. But this turned out to be my favourite drama (Falling for Innocence). That brings another thing into discussion, the abusive relationships people seem to have with their bosses in dramas. They are yelled at, abused and smacked around. 

- A more subtle  abuse is present in k-drama as well, that bugs me the most. This is when the lead female supresses her personality and agrees to everything the male says or does or wants. Even if she doesn't like it. This is the worst to me. Usually it begins with us getting to know their great separate personalities then when they get together, bam, we suddenly have a morose silent female with a domineering male. 

Despite this, I find the positives in k-drama outweigh the negative for me. If I lived in korea I think I would be more worried about the societal problems this could represent  but I don't. However I do see that for the younger fans of k-drama it is worrisome that they find this stuff romantic, but it's also important to know the context of the drama in particular.
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Dreamwalker
In general, slapping women has been attached to most dramas.  I can only assume they still perceive it as a good way of providing shock value.  However, it is so prevalent in just about every series that it becomes agitating the more I end up seeing it for said attention grab.  That isn't going to change though, as it seems to be generally accepted given how often it is used.

The only other thing I always find annoying is the classic (guys get into fight to resolve differences and build camaraderie).  As that seems more abnormal to me than wrist grabbing.  As getting into a physical fight to solve issues shows a way bigger problem if looked upon positively as a form of communication.

All in all, everything is fictional and if you read into it too much, you can get blinded by all the negatives.  As said above, if I lived in Korea, it would probably impact me way more and lead to a larger discussion.

On a side note: I agree completely about Falling for Innocence.  That series can be particularly abusive, but it stands as one of the best I have seen.  It is one of the few series if not the only one, where I truly felt the lead male was angry.  His reactions were so on point with what one would actually go through in the situations he found himself in throughout the series.
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