All men are goats

I have a book on Chinese history that says “18+” on the front cover of it. This how the whole history of China actually is: with the rating of 18+. It can be called the history “below the belt”. This is not so much the history of China as it is the history of Chinese emperors and their concubines: which emperor, with which concubine, in which place, at which time, and in which position. And it was all recorded by the palace eunuchs! Despite the strict censorship, the Chinese historical drama Story of Yanxi Palace managed to show that quite well. That's the only harem drama I liked.

I would like to point out that the best and most beautiful things about love, including sensual love, are written in the Bible. Do you think that all Christians are snobs who faint at the word “sex”? Not at all. I will quote you lines from the Book of Proverbs, part one, chapter 5, verses 18-19: “May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer — may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be intoxicated with her love!” Also read the Song of Songs. This is the Bible, not the Kamasutra, don't get confused.

The Orthodox will call me a heretic. Let them go to the ass. They are heretics themselves. My brain is completely in sync with the Lord. I speak, write and do what God wants. Of course, these lines of the Bible describe pure and unadulterated love, love for a lawful wife. In fact, true, deep love does not happen spontaneously. It is a long process. Real love comes about gradually. First, interest in each other appears, then sympathy, next comes infatuation, and then it all forms into a deep feeling.

I will not sing the praises to the drama Story of Yanxi Palace, there are enough “singers” without me. My score speaks for itself. I'd rather tell you about what I found interesting in it, what moments I remembered and my impressions of the series.

In the second episode, the main heroine, Wei Ying Luo, says that it is important for people with a kind heart to be able to stand up for themselves. At least, that's how I understood that phrase. Those her words can be called the motto of the whole drama, as well as the motto of my life. That's right, good must be able to fight off evil. I am also sympathetic to the Manchus' policy at the time shown in the drama, which has banned the practice of foot-binding of Han women. This is a terrible and bloody tradition that is beyond my understanding.

And now I would like to tell you what interesting things I saw in the series. And I saw a lot. The historical region of China, Jiangnan, is again repeatedly mentioned in the drama. The Jiangnan River, which is the Yangtze River, is also mentioned. In addition, Suzhou is mentioned many times. It's noteworthy that one of the directors of Story of Yanxi Palace, Guo Hao, made another historical drama that I watched and liked, namely Marvelous Women. Events in Marvelous Women also take place in the Jiangnan region, in the Gusu District in Suzhou, Jiangsu Province, during the reign of the same emperor of the last Chinese Qing Dynasty, Qianlong, who is the main male character in Story of Yanxi Palace. And one of the soundtracks to Marvelous Women is called Old Friends of Jiangnan (a beautiful song, listen to it).

In addition, the director Guo Hao is from the Shandong province of China. Shandong is also repeatedly mentioned in Story of Yanxi Palace. Thus, Shandong, as well as Hebei, are mentioned in the thirty-first episode. Shandong is also mentioned in the fifty-third and sixty-second episodes. And in the forty-ninth episode, Shandong’s Jinan is mentioned.

I understand why some of the Chinese historical dramas I've watched mention Hebei: it borders Shandong. And why Shandong is mentioned in many Chinese dramas is clear to a mother goat. It's clear to everyone except the person for whom these signs from God are intended. It's a pity that Shandong has been forever desecrated by that asshole Confucius by his birth in this province.

While watching Story of Yanxi Palace I also realised why many Chinese historical dramas I watched repeatedly mentioned Jiangnan. And it's not just because the Chinese love it so much, but also because this flourishing and prosperous historical region of China is so similar to Ukraine with its beautiful willows, birches, poplars, rivers, lakes and seas.

In the second episode of the drama, the lower-ranking dames greeted the higher-ranking dames with the words “peace be upon you”. The Lord Christ greeted His disciples in the same way after His resurrection. By the way, Wei Ying Luo was right to hit that tree in that same episode. That tree should generally have been cut down. Or was she supposed to worship some tree?! It was correctly said in the third episode that trees were treated better than humans in the Forbidden City.

In the drama, I heard the phrase “the sun rises in the west”, which I also heard in the series Dr. Tang. Yes, the sun indeed rises in the West... where I live. I saw a lot of sun in Story of Yanxi Palace. Pay attention to the sun in the sixth episode at 22:54, in the eleventh episode at 1:53, in the thirtieth episode at 36:39, in the thirty-seventh episode at 23:55 and 25:22, in the thirty-eighth episode at 27:28. Pay special attention to the sun in the forty-third episode at 41:13, and in the forty-fourth episode at 30:48. There is also a lot of sunshine in the opening credits of the drama.

And now I'm going to tell you something interesting. While watching Story of Yanxi Palace, I finished embroidering the sailboat, beaded orchids in a vase from the embroidery kit called Solar Etude-1 which I bought back at the beginning of the year (note the name), cross-stitched a lion and started embroidering a new kit. Even Wei Ying Luo would envy my embroidery speed. :)

The bedspread I use continuously has been bought for me by my mother a very long time ago. It is a bedspread by the South Korean company Solaron. And while watching Story of Yanxi Palace, when I was walking down the street one day, I saw a trolleybus with the word “Solaris” written on the front of it.

In the drama, I heard familiar names of characters that I had heard in other Chinese historical series. For example, one of the Empress Fuca Rongyin's maidservants was named Hu Po. The same name was used for the maid of Luo Shi Yi Niang in The Sword and the Brocade. In the drama the maid of the Noble Consort Yu is called Fang Cao. In the series Jun Jiu Ling, there is a female character with the same name.

In the twenty-fifth episode of the drama, it was said that summer had come early. When I watched that episode, it was early May, but in Ukraine, it was as hot as in summer. So we could say that summer came early for us too. In the same episode, it is also said that the Empress Fuca dislikes hot summers the most. I don't like hot summers either.

In the thirty-first episode, at 20:47, there is a Ukrainian flag behind the eunuch Yuan Chun Wang. In the forty-first episode at 32:23 and in the forty-second episode at 7:16, I also saw the Ukrainian flag. In the forty-ninth episode, Wei Ying Luo, sitting on a horse, resembled a Ukrainian flag herself... against the backdrop of a Ukrainian flag (hint: look at the walls in those scenes). I also liked the blue and yellow caftan of the Emperor in the thirty-ninth and fortieth episodes. In addition, I again saw familiar patterns on things in the series that I have seen many times in other Chinese historical dramas.

In the forty-first episode, the Empress Dowager presented the Emperor with thirty-three types of useful medicines. That medicinal formula was called “Longevity”. Jesus Christ died and rose again at the age of thirty-three. I also died and rose again in early 2023 at the age of thirty-three, just like Christ.

In the forty-eighth episode, one of the Emperor's concubines called Wei Ying Luo “an enchantress that brings disaster and suffering to the nation and the people”. The lion, which I have cross-stitched while watching the drama, is from an embroidery kit by a Ukrainian company called Чарівниця (The Enchantress).

In the sixtieth episode, the Empress Dowager says that Wei Ying Luo's entire body is covered with thorns. The Prince Chen said the same thing about the Prince Ye Mu Jing in Zhuo Zhuo Feng Liu. In fact, my whole body is covered with thorns too, figuratively speaking of course. :)

Then it gets even more interesting. On the day I watched the sixty-sixth episode of the drama in which the fifth prince injured his right leg, namely 31 May, I fell while walking down the street and could not stand on my right leg. On 1 June, my leg no longer hurt. In a word, miracles. :)

In the drama Wei Ying Luo embroidered an image of an idol using her own hair. Luo Shi Yi Niang also embroidered an image of the same idol in The Sword and the Brocade, also using her own hair. That's what I didn't like most about both series, which was why I lowered the score. If not for that, I would have given a 10 to Story of Yanxi Palace. In one of the episodes, a liar shaman appears, which is not surprising because they are all liars. And in the final episode, the Consort Xian's clothes feature the Nazi swastika. Who would doubt that she is a Nazi... like most Chinese.

All three directors of Story of Yanxi Palace cast their favourite actors in the roles. The singers have also joined in. Lu Hu first sang in Story of Yanxi Palace, and then “migrated” to Marvelous Women. His songs in Story of Yanxi Palace are nice, but my favourite is Hu Xia's Sighs of Vermillion Walls, which reflects the unhappy life of every woman in the Forbidden City, from a simple maid to an empress. And the song by Li Chun Yuan (Li Chunai) called Willows of the Palace can be sung without even knowing the words. It is written in such a way that it can be simply meowed: mew mew mew, mew mew mew, etc. :)

As always, the actresses performed better than the actors in the drama. Most of all, I liked the acting of Wu Jin Yan, who portrayed Wei Ying Luo. She organically fit into the role. Although she was not the first beauty on the outside, she compensated for her appearance with an excellent performance.

Qin Lan in this drama is completely different from her in Dr. Tang. That's what a real actress is. But as a singer, I don't like her. Her voice is weak. She sang The Sound of Snow Falling by Lu Hu badly. I would have sung this song better, especially in a duet with Lu Hu. In fact, while watching the drama, I was singing along with him when that his song sounded. I was also impressed with Charmaine Sheh's acting. I liked her in The Legend of Kublai Khan, but her performance in Story of Yanxi Palace was just amazing.

I have something in common with the actress Tan Zhuo, who appears in the drama as The Noble Consort Gao. Her acting is not bad either. I also have something in common with the Emperor Qianlong (a real person, not a series character). Those who are observant will guess what I mean. Despite this, I don't like him at all, neither a real person nor a character in this drama.

In the series, I was constantly annoyed by Ming Yu, performed by Jiang Zi Xin. They cast that ugly woman again. :( A real woman should have breasts, hips and a bum. Jiang Zi Xin has none of this. She's not a woman, but some kind of sleeper. I also wondered how much the actress Jenny Zhang (Zhang Jia Ni) paid plastic surgeons to make her face like Barbie's. Her face in the drama was unnatural and disgusting.

Xu Kai acted the worst of all, but he fit perfectly into the role of Fuca Fuheng, a foolish, spoilt and smug boy with a golden spoon in the mouth, because he himself was like that. Something surprises me. How, after the role of Fuca Fuheng in such a strong drama as Story of Yanxi Palace, he managed to act in that crap called 1921?! О_о He humiliated himself by appearing in that propaganda. Films like 1921 and others like it will be forgotten in a few years, as will the actors who have acted in them. Instead, such dramas as Story of Yanxi Palace will be remembered even in ten years.

In fact, almost everyone has forgotten the film 1921, except me, because I want to trample it completely into the mud, just like that scarecrow who has acted the role of Li Da in it. He will not gain fame, popularity or wealth. Soon he won't have a single friend left. Christ and I will take care of it. I will make an example of him for others, so that they realise what will happen to those who dare to offend me. I will multiply him by zero. In the twelfth episode of Story of Yanxi Palace, one imperial guard says that women's hatred is terrible and it is best to avoid it. It's true. One hideous creature didn't know that. It is worse for him.

If Wei Ying Luo is a fierce dog, I am a fierce tigress. Guess which of us is more dangerous. The answer is obvious.Yes, yes, if I were the Empress-Huángdì of the Southern Chen in Zhuo Zhuo Feng Liu, the Prince Ye Mu Jing would be galloping away from me to his Northern Liang, forgetting about his numerous tents. :):):)

And now guess which of the female characters in Story of Yanxi Palace I like the most and which of them I am most like in character. Of course, this is Wei Ying Luo. In the tenth episode of the drama, Zhang Muo Muo called Ying Luo a brilliant girl. The same can be said about me. This series is about me. I'm just like Wei Ying Luo: a woman with heavy thoughts, a cold face, but a hot heart. I also know exactly who I love, who I hate, and I am a great fighter for justice. On my face it is written in big letters “decent and smart”. Wei Ying Luo was her usual self at the beginning of the series and remained her usual self at the end. She is the strongest “player” in the drama. The melody from the South Korean historical television series Hwarang called More And More suits both Wei Ying Luo and me. It perfectly emphasises our playful and witty nature.

The Empress Fuca was too kind and too merciful. Not everyone in the world can be pitied. You have to think about who is worth pitying and who is not. The Lord God anointed Saul to be the first king over Israel. But because Saul did not obey God and did not kill all the enemies of the people of Israel, including the women, children and livestock, the Lord rejected him and anointed David to be king over Israel instead, who obeyed God and killed all the enemies so that not even a single livestock was left alive.

And the Consort Xian was very naive. She was sent to the “bug house”, but she thought that she could live there freely, as she wished, and with a clear conscience. As a result, she went from one extreme to the other, becoming the worst of those dragons in the Forbidden City, whom she herself despised.

There was another female character in the drama. This is the Dowager Yu, the Prince He's mother. She was a strong believer in Buddhism, but in reality she was a murderer. This is what such faith is worth. The pagan is the pagan. That's what faith in Buddhism and idols leads to. As a result, God killed her with a thunderbolt for all her sins.

But it's not women who need to be scolded the most in the series, but men. The drama Story of Yanxi Palace proves once again that all men are goats: shameless, cruel, heartless and ruthless. In the tenth episode, the Empress Fuca says that it is really hard to find an affectionate man. And Ming Yu says in one of the episodes that all men are useless. It's true. Both of these women are right. All men are selfish, thinking only of themselves and their ambitions.

I didn't like any of them in the drama, neither in appearance nor in character. As we say in Ukraine, my eye had nowhere to fall. Each of the men in the series had major flaws. And yes, those stupid pigtails on the men really annoyed me. I wanted to put bows on them. :) The Emperor was the worst asshole. He had a complex that all the women in the palace wanted him, but in fact no one needed him. :) The Emperor considered himself a son of Heaven, but he was so ill-mannered that when he yawned, he didn't even close his mouth. How uncultured. The true Son of Heaven is the Lord Jesus Christ.

Qianlong in the series wanted Fuca Rongyin to give birth to a prince, not a princess. As a result, the Empress Fuca lost her unborn child. Obviously, a girl was supposed to be born. The Emperor is a total jerk. And I have told you that only real men want daughters. The Emperor Qianlong was not such a man. He was the coldest and most cruel person in the whole drama.

In all ages and at all times, women have suffered the most from men. But they still tried to be better and more beautiful for the very men who did not deserve it. Let me give you   examples from this drama. While watching, it was painful for me to glance at the women. I looked at them and thought: “How can they walk around in these “pebbles”?” That's what I thought about their terribly high and uncomfortable shoes. And did the Consort Xian's love for the Emperor pay off? No. And there were a lot of such things in the series.

What pleased me was the opening and finale credits. By the way, the final credits change here, and different songs sound in them. It was well done. In the opening credits, I especially liked the screensaver at the end of them, namely the depiction of golden Chinese hieroglyphs and English letters of the series title on a bright red background. What a beautiful thing! It looks like someone will get married soon. I hope it will be me. :)

After the drama Story of Yanxi Palace, I have completely made sure that Wen De Guang's dramas are worth watching. This is probably not his last drama I've watched. The future will show. I'm not going to watch the so-called sequel to this drama entitled Yanxi Palace: Princess Adventures. It's not worth it. For me, the story of Wei Ying Luo will end on the last episode of Story of Yanxi Palace.

Over the long time I've been watching Story of Yanxi Palace, I've understood a lot about my life. I want to share this with you. As you probably know, in the Chinese historical drama Tribes and Empires: Storm of Prophecy, I have liked two male characters the most: Muyun Lu and Muru Han Shan. Throughout that drama, Muyun Lu tried to prevent Su Yu Ning from marrying Muyun Sheng. And Muru Han Shan generally told his youngest brother that Muyun Sheng was a freak. Muru Han Shan was generally a straightforward guy, who said what he thought. :) Christ would have called Muru Han Shan from Tribes and Empires and Liao Xiao Bo from Dr. Tang, people who have no guile in them, as He has said about Nathanael ( the Gospel of the Apostle John, chapter 1, verse 47).

And now I'm sitting and thinking: “Why didn't I listen to those two male characters who I liked the most in that drama back when I watched it three times?!” As the Jews say, “So that I might be as smart now as my wife later”. :) Muyun Lu is the prototype of Jesus Christ, and Muru Han Shan is the prototype of my future husband. Those are the two lions that I dreamed about at the end of last year. I also understood why I dreamed of a white dragon then.

I have a C.S. Lewis’ book called The Chronicles of Narnia, which includes all seven parts of this saga. In it, goodness is represented by a lion named Aslan (the word “aslan” means “lion” in Turkish). This lion is a prototype of Jesus Christ. That was the intention of the author of the saga, who was a Christian. In the first part of the saga, entitled The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, the White Witch represents evil. So, did you understand why I dreamed of a white dragon? Evil always wants to appear as good, and black as white. Muyun Sheng also wore white clothes throughout Tribes and Empires. But the demon is the demon. By the way, there is a fire lion on the front cover of this my book.

Let's also mention the Harry Potter series of books. There are four faculties at Hogwarts, founded by four wizards, two of whom are men and two are women. The Chronicles of Narnia also has four main characters, including two girls and two boys. The characters of the four founders of Hogwarts in Harry Potter were copied by J.K. Rowling from those four heroes and heroines of The Chronicles of Narnia.

And remember which is the best faculty at Hogwarts. That's right, Gryffindor. Do you remember what the Gryffindor coat of arms is? A golden lion on a scarlet background. The colours of this faculty are gold and scarlet. Now take a look at the scarlet and gold screensaver at the end of the opening credits to Story of Yanxi Palace. Got it? I'll also remind you of the end of the last Harry Potter book. In it, Harry dies but is resurrected. Doesn't that remind you of anything? Well, you fools, have you understood at least something?!

That “plastic surgery victim” who has performed Muyun Lu in Tribes and Empires is not worthy of this role. He is just a supporting actor. I wish him to act a “fifth wheel” in a cart for the rest of his life. I want him to stand in front of a mirror ten times a day all his life and say “I am a panda”, looking at his reflection in it. Maybe it will teach him something. He is a pig and eats like a pig. And guess who he is according to the Chinese horoscope. Pig. Who would have doubted it. :)

Qu Gao Wei shouldn't be deluded either. He bears little resemblance to Muru Han Shan, whom he has portrayed. There is a big difference between the actor and his character. I hope he doesn't think he's one of the lions and my future husband. Of course not. He rolled his lip unreasonably. Only God knows who my future husband is and when I will meet him. I know you very well, Chinese male actors. You're all goats, who want to use me. Remember, my only love is Jesus Christ, who protects me from all of you. All kinds of love are short-lived, except the love for God, which is for life. I have been born with it, and I will go to eternity with it.

By the way, Sun Jian and Qu Gao Wei have something in common. Their natal charts both say that their wives will give them horns and pass off someone else's child as their own. That's what Hitara Erqing did with Fuca Fuheng in Story of Yanxi Palace. What can I say? Two deer, hee-hee, ha-ha. :):):) Hard times have come. Even lions come across defective. :)

While I was watching Story of Yanxi Palace, interesting events happened in the world.  “The actor of the burned theatre” Xi Jinping went on a “concert tour” to Europe and “caroled” criticism of his close ties with russia. And what did he think? It is in China that he can silence anyone who opposes his policies. But in Europe, there are free people. And the French generally sent a dozen dictators like him to the guillotine. But what made me laugh the most was that “circus of clowns” led by putin, who then came to Xi “on the carpet”. :)

As a result, PRC began supplying russia with lethal weapons. This proves once again that I have been right in everything I have said. Instead of dealing with the problems of its citizens, China got involved in someone else's war. And this will continue as long as Xi Jinping is in power. He has sacrificed the interests of China and the Chinese for the interests of his friend putin. Every time I think that maybe the Chinese are not as bad as I think they are, the Chinese and the Chinese Communist Party “break through another bottom”. Meanwhile, the Lord sent the bastard Raisi to hell. That's where he's going. Minus one ghoul. This is how God treats dictators. I wonder who's next. I've already bought a packet of popcorn, a Coca-Cola, and I'm going to watch as God will send one by one all those ghouls to the next world.

In the end, I would like to recommend you to listen to a song by Ruslana called Дикі танці (the Ukrainian version of Wild Dances). In it you will hear the sounds of Hutsul trembitas. Back in 2004, Ruslana won the first victory on the Eurovision Song Contest for Ukraine with the English version of that song. The song Дикі танці begins with the words “Probably, in vain was I too polite”. And so it is. I really have been too polite to you. In order for you to understand something, you need to be whipped, as the Dowager Yu did in the twenty-fourth episode of Story of Yanxi Palace with her son, the Prince He. :) By the way, Ruslana and her backup dancers in the official video for this song have whips. 

Also, I would like you to listen to a song by Nadav Guedj called Golden Boy, which was Israel's song at the Eurovision Song Contest in 2015. In my opinion, it was the song that should have won the Eurovision Song Contest that year. It's a pity that Israel didn't win the Eurovision that year. But in 2018, Israel did win the Eurovision Song Contest with Netta's song called TOY. Be sure to listen to this song. Listening to the lyrics, you will immediately understand who it suits. :)

This whole song is funny, but two lines from it just “finished me off”. These are the lines “My teddy bear's running away” and “I'm taking my Pikachu home”. I hope you don't think that Pikachu in this case means a toy. No, it's not a toy. In his case, it's eight centimetres. :):):):):) So, did you understand?! I continue to be amazed at what a great joker the Lord God is. He prepared everything in advance. By the way, pay attention to the blue and yellow label of the Eurovision Song Contest 2018 in Lisbon.

Well, are you still not afraid of me? And you should be afraid. I am a golden lady dressed in all red, and you are stupid, uncouth serfs. Do you know what faculty I would be sent to at Hogwarts if I have lived in the fantasy world of Harry Potter? I'll tell you in the words of the Sorting Hat: “GRYFFINDOR!” Yes, yes, I am in the team of “Aslan”. 

And I will end my review by addressing the Chinese male actors with the following words from Netta's song TOY: “Welcome boys, too much noise, I will teach ya. Pam pam pa hoo, turram pam pa hoo”. :):):)