Screenwriter Robert
Oklahoma City, United States
An Unfortunate Failure
La Pluie's lack of a well-thought-out story, even with its vague hearing loss gimmick, is its undoing. An underdeveloped script is exposed the longer it goes.A unique premise needs high level understanding of screenwriting to pull off successfully, especially in a series. Otherwise, the unique premise can prove too much for the novice to handle.
The result of a poor script don't just apply to the audience. The cast can be left to flounder with unclear or nonsensical character motivations.
La Pluie's faults are not rare in the BL space, but viewers are desperate to see them improved. To improve the BL space is to ditch the entire premise.
Your goal should not be to write/produce a "BL", your goal should be to create a great story for screen that just so happens to have a same-sex couple at its core. This would broaden project appeal to a wider audience, attract better talent and generate more revenue.
As for La Pluie itself: I would have challenged myself to write a first draft outline of La Pluie without the hearing loss premise. If we can craft a good story without the premise, then the foundation is laid as you then go about adding in said premise in future drafts. The ending should leave open the possibility of a second season, while also providing some closure.
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This review may contain spoilers
Structurally doomed
I could feel it.Right about midway the writer was getting boxed into a tragic ending, then, was forced to make it a good ending. Solution; Tack on an alternative timeline!
Ruined what could have been something truly special. If they wanted to go that way, they should have done so from the beginning.
Odd scenes like; The car breaks down. Next scene they're back to hotel. Next day they're back out in the now working car, which promptly breaks down again? 😂 Huh? This goes beyond a mistake, suggesting general stupidity. If this was an alternative timeline, it was a really stupid one.
Just organize the scene intentions properly; Where are the characters at emotionally? What is believable and will drive the story forward? Get rid of everything else. Of course this only works if you HAVE a story.
And, I don't care if it's "BL". I care if time is taken to get the story right for the cast and crew who put so much effort into it. As it is, the barely first draft mode story failed a great cast, soundtrack and cinema photography trying to dress it up.
In an alternative timeline, I wrote a glowing review, while admitting I understood almost nothing.
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This review may contain spoilers
Story Has Failed Again
This is a few years old now, but every so often I'm drawn back to it to figure it out - was it that bad? It was. The story. The non-existent story, that is. Organized crime should be a story goldmine. What if the lead falls for the bad guy from a rival gang who he later learns ordered the killing of his father? There's a lot you can do here, provided actual writers are given the time (and money) to write it.Was this review helpful to you?
Unique, Painful & Brilliant
A film is not written to protect the audience from unpleasant paths to love. Utsukushii Kare intends to drag you through an unpleasant, and dysfunctional relationship, which I would argue, honestly reflects the often screwed up nature of first love.The brilliance (but also risky) in this work is in how it's structured, only letting us in Hira's world to start, and then surprising you by bringing you into Kiyoi's world to bring the story together. The result is, yes, an at times uncomfortable watch, but ultimately achieving beautiful moments.
All of this to say, watch this series. Withstand the tough stuff, and remember, characters must be flawed. By the end you'll get what's being shared here, and I think, most will enjoy it. Thanks.
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