Perhaps I am the only one who saw this BL as an allegory and a beautiful story. Of course it has some repugnant scenes in it but if you look at it as an allegory, perhaps it makes a bit more sense. This is painful no question but should not be dismissed because of the prism in which we view this series. We are NOT these guys. What happened between the two of them can not be undone but in this case ONLY they can decide and call it what they want. Does that make it right? NO! But it explains a lot. They have little time to explore their feelings and no avenues to do so. Can you imagine leaving your soulmate without ever knowing his touch, his warmth, his intensity. I can not judge their actions but only accept it. Life does not always follow the yellow brick road to happiness.