You know I had to be angry enough to actually sign on and write a review....I'm a middle aged white woman, trying to learn Chinese, and discovered BL quite late in the game. So quit reading if my thoughts wouldn't be worth your while.....all set? Ok. This series seriously grew on me. SO concerned about the bullying, stalking, and lack of boundaries this show depicted. However, that being said, I felt that it portrayed accurately the puppy-like mentality of teenaged boy culture. There was something that felt true about it - the pent up emotions, the love poured out in friendship, the anger sprouting from loyalty. While I was really fed up with the boys, I was also made acutely aware of the truth in the way they treated each other.

The weak male lead was quite a good actor, and grew on me. But I couldn't see what the girls (and male lead) were crushing on? He was barely there....a strong breeze would have surely swept him away. Perhaps this was a problem with the casting - but he DID look impoverished and vulnerable and the perfect target for bullying. Once that disjuncture passed, I got really into the story, especially the chain of reactions that led to male lead's remorse and very sincere apology for being a pig towards the weaker one.

The portrayal of sexual aggression was troubling. Second couple's first kiss - a forced one in a locker room, was seriously problematic, but the guy being forced was, like, what, 30? And the younger guy was just so clueless about how to handle his hormones...it felt real. Their sex scene (unsafe sex, anyone?) was obviously consensual, and the older guy sort of showing the younger how it worked - these are the reason BL's are important, even if it would have been better with a condom-getting moment. History 4: Close to You - does a good job teaching the kinds of things young men should know, including open communication and asking questions.

The pressure male lead 1 put on male lead 2 to "give yourself to me" made me seriously uncomfortable. He came around in the end - but with such a huge pouting period, that male lead 2 gave in, albeit with older lead guy giving him advice..."follow your heart" and "have confidence in yourself." All good things - but how about, not until you're ready? Talk it out with each other?

Finally - the ending. I was sooooooo very angry at this last episode that I cannot even put words to my frustration. I don't know where to even begin! The accident was not covered - we don't know what happened exactly - other than he got hit by a car, and what about everyone else's reaction, like older male lead, who cared for him? But then some version of him keeps appearing? I thought (bear with me here) that perhaps, he had some kind of brain injury that made him lose his memory and mentally stall at 18 - so no matter what happened, he never matured or was able to learn more and meet his goals? So he doesn't remember male lead 1, or their relationship...that, in itself, would be tragic. To have your lover not remember or be able to progress beyond a teenager would be kind of like having a spouse with dementia. But then, his old girlfriend shows up and talks about the aunt having a small funeral, etc., which confused the heck out of me. Is he dead? Were those hallucinations? A doppleganger? And why, if it was hallucinations, was the version of weak male lead 2 so weirdly hip? What the heck??? And male lead 1 was so pathetically sad - there was no way for the viewer to process! The ending was SO unsatisfying. I couldn't sleep, as my mind was actively trying to figure out what it all meant.

So I'm torn. I did like the portrayal of male hormonal love (lust, really) - well, not liked it, really, but thought it realistic at any rate. The character arks for both male leads of couple 1 were believable, and very well acted. But the ENDING. We all need closure, and the writing let us down.