Do you ever watch something that moves you, that shakes you, and leaves a mark? The appropriate word is “qui vous chamboule”, but there is no English translation for the word “chambouler”. There is no translation for this feeling of being deeply touched by something that stays with you and shakes you to your core. This is the feeling that I am left with after having watched I Told Sunset About You.

We had been recommended ITSAY many times before finally taking the plunge. We had been warned of its quality, we had been warned that it would emotionally devastate us, we had been warned that it would be worth it. All three things were correct. This show stands on its own among the best shows I have ever seen. It is so far beyond the traditional clichés of BL dramas that I am not even sure it should be qualified as one.

I have rarely seen such thoughts put into the directing and the cinematography in a tv show anywhere. They make use of negative space on screen, the colour choices are always meaningful, every single shot is well made. The accompanying documentary (which I highly recommend you watch after finishing the show and which brought my appreciation for the work done by the cast and crew to a whole new level and it was already very high) shows even more the quality of the craft. Some of the scenes are highly effective because of the way they are shot, and any other filming angle would not have worked as well. The director was not afraid to make us stay in a moment with the characters way longer than was comfortable specifically because this moment was meant to be uncomfortable. The end of episode 3 is a masterful example of that. The gorgeous final scene is another example of both the talent and skills of the cast and crew and the amazing luck that they seem to have had. I am simply in awe of the work that was done and could not keep myself from marvelling out loud at the cinematography and directing even as I was watching the show.

The acting was also absolutely stunning from the youngest members of the crew (Khun who plays Bas is only 17 and I will be following his career) to the two main actors, Billkin and PP, and the other side characters. I already appreciated Nat who plays Teh’s brother’s Hoon, but watching the documentary also added him to the list of people whose career I want to follow (a trend for pretty much every actor in this show) and Smile who plays Tarn and manages to give such a depth to a character that could have easily (and often is in other dramas) been vilified. I am in awe of all of them. PP and Billkin are both absolutely amazing as Oh-aew and Teh. They ooze chemistry and they play off each other so well. The depth of character they both bring to those characters, the turmoil that is present inside of both of them constantly, the micro expressions, the looks, the way they deliver lines, the everything! I could honestly go on forever about some of the choices they all made at different points in the story, but that would be going into way too much detail and spoil the entire thing, but boy, will I be going elsewhere to read analyses of these.

And the music! The music! The Music! Three songs were recorded for this show in different versions sang by the two main actors and those were then strategically placed at different moments of the drama to add even more layers to an already layered story. Some moments which had already brought me to tears made me shed even more tears because a particular version of one of the songs started playing. Even the general OST is very well done and appropriate for the different moments. They made very good use of the music (and of the silences) in this show and the music itself was just so good. I will be listening to the OST on its own in the future because it is just that good.

And finally, the story. I left the story for last because I am not sure I have the words to talk about it. Everything I mentioned before comes together to support the story and what a scenario it has. This drama essentially gives us 5 films by the duration of each episode. They pack so many emotions. The writers said in an interview that for the emotional scenes, they purposely chose the dialogues so that they would make us cry and boy, have they succeeded. I was crying from the first episode. They managed to get me attached to those characters from the first moment. The kids we first see, best friends about to become rival, and the teenagers we then meet, the rivals to friends to lovers and so much more in between. The themes explored in this show are explored throughout the entirety of the drama from the expectations that our parents have from us (and sometimes that we think our parents have for us, but which are almost entirely our own. I know that really resonated with me and special mention to all of the parents in this show whose actors did a great job) to the discovery of our feelings for others, the confusion surrounding it, the discovery of our sexuality, the internalised homophobia we can feel, the discovery of what we want from life, from others, the pressure to succeed, the stress associated with it, the fear of what others might think about our choices, about who we are, the fear that is so present that you do not even dare to think about it for fear of making it real, the hurt we cause others because we are lost, because we do not want to face our feelings and our fears, because we act without thinking because we think it is the only way.

When I reviewed “Gaya sa Pelikula”, I said that it was making me think about issues I still had surrounding my identity and who I am and what I want today. For “I Told Sunset About You”, I see myself as a teenager in high school at 16 or 17, I see myself in Teh, in his obliviousness, in his fear, in his repression, in so much. There is something about seeing a character being terrified of what he wants and the way the story uses the device of studying for the exam to explore feelings and how characters use it as an excuse too. I will not go into too many details about moments in the story, but the choices made to tell this story, the use of gazes, of colours, of silences, of things said and unsaid (especially unsaid for Teh and his path to being able to use his voice without repressing it because of fear), I would not have enough space to tell everything I want to say. As I said, I relate a lot to Teh, but the other characters also get space to have their stories told. Oh-aew is starting from a different point to Teh, but is no less afraid and stressed about his future. We get discussions on what he wants and his slow realisation of it, like that of Teh, but with significantly more emotional maturity (they all have way more emotional maturity than Teh), the contrast of his character, way more sure of himself and observant than Teh but still so vulnerable, so young.

Both Bas, Oh-aew’s friend, and Tarn, Teh’s friend and the girl he likes at the beginning of the show, who could have got the short end of the stick (as is usually the case for this type of characters) got so much depth from the script and the actors. They got a progression in the story, they grew, they made choices, they were not simply just tools for the main two characters (and it is even addressed in the show, we love to see it). They deserve the world and I sincerely hope they will get it. Hoon, Teh’s brother gets to play in several key scenes, but there is one scene in particular in the last episode that is one of my favourite scenes in the whole show that moved this character from one I quite liked to one I loved. They really exploited both brothers’ relationship and how it affected Teh throughout the show and it is refreshing to see such a well-done relationship.

I am in awe of so many things, of the dialogues, of the moments without dialogues when they let the actors use their eyes and their body to convey emotions and messages, the use of Chinese, of props, the reminders, the objects used once in one way and then reused in completely different way to geta completely different emotions out of us (something that the crew said they did on purpose). Special mention for the use of Instagram in the show which I never seen used so effectively and in a way that made sense for the characters and the stories, but also managed to tell us so much about them (episode 4, if you know, you know).

I could continue for pages and pages, but this has already started to become too long. I am honestly in awe of everything in this show. The actors are fantastic (and did I mention PP and Billkin’s chemistry because it is off the charts!). The story is so well crafted, making us laugh and cry, smile and scream, wonder and worry. The directing is stunning. The job by the crew is wonderful (I once again cannot recommend you enough to watch the documentary that accompanies the series (that underwater scene!!)). The music will make you cry and you will start listening to it on repeat. Everything in this show was wonderfully made. Everyone involved gave their best and it really, really shows! I want this show to make a mark. I want everyone to watch this show. I want it to win awards and be shared abroad. I want to buy posters to put on my wall and DVD to put on my shelf. I want to rewatch it again and again to see all of the things I have missed, all of the symbolism that is peppered throughout the show. I am not sure I would be able to do it straight away because this show is so much and some of the story arcs and scenes left me emotionally devastated, but oh how worth it it was. I cannot recommend you enough this show. Please watch and support it!