Perfect--except for the ending . . .

This would be my top Cdrama of all time if it had a better ending! I loved it so much. The acting was great, most of the characters and storylines were relatable and touching. The only people that were meh to me were CL and LY, seemed like neither had any personality. But LS in particular really shined as a character. I loved watching him grow and I think the actor did an amazing job.

At times I felt like I wasn't watching a drama, I was watching a documentary. A lot of people watch dramas to escape so they don't want it to be like real life and don't care how far-fetched it is; however, I watch them because that's exactly what I'm looking for. I feel like these characters were the first people I've "met" that feel the way I have felt. I want characters and circumstances to be real and this drama hit the mark better than anything else I have watched. It wasn't afraid to show the ugliness of life and that everything is going to be okay in the end, you can get through it.

I especially liked how things developed between LS and XJ post-confession for the sheer fact LS had a much different reaction than normal, instead of becoming defeated he doubled down--and I truly believe that is the best course of action you can take for someone like XJ. Some might see it as pushy but I think there are times when you need to persist because it's not that the other person is resisting because they are not interested, but because they are scared. It was refreshing to see a character who did not fall into despair because someone didn't accept them right away, instead they stood by their feelings AND their own value.

It was a great show . . . until the last two episodes. It was like they planned for 50 episodes but got to episode 34 and learned they could only produce two more. The storylines were rushed, they didn't really make sense, and frankly it was hard to connect with the wedding for example because it was so disconnected and out of nowhere that you had no emotional attachment to the couple in question. Then imagine the one you love leaves without telling you, you don't see or hear from them for FIVE YEARS, and they just show up and end up proposing after messing around with your feelings for two or three days. Like it was so jarring and disappointing, the pacing wasn't the same as the rest of the series and we never really got to see the main leads in a relationship or resolving the issues between them. It was a lot of buildup to something amazing and then it just crashed and burned.

I consider it a great tragedy how this show ended, it deserved better. I would honestly be okay if there was a season two and they were just like "Yeah those last two episodes were just a dream, let's get back to the REAL story." But I just finished it yesterday however and I already want to start again! So I'd still recommend it.

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Did I watch the same show as everyone else?

I had a lot of hope for this one, it started out strong, I really like Gu Qian Fan and I thought him and the FL had great chemistry. But as time wore on it got harder and harder to watch. I just didn't find most of the characters or storylines that interesting past about episode 8, when it really started to drag for me. It also started getting annoying that the main characters seemed to just be amazing at everything. Stories aren't very interesting when you're already at the top and there's no real growth to be had.

I've seen numerous times the main couple being referred to as "adults" in a "mature" relationship. For me the reason I watch C-dramas is because they aren't like Western entertainment, which tries to tell people it is depicting love when it is really depicting a toxic and sometimes borderline abusive relationship, with mind games and emotionally manipulative behaviour. C-dramas can be hit or miss but I love their depiction of loyalty, honesty, and unconditional love. The West, by comparison, doesn't even know the meaning of love. Or chemistry. Or empathy. Personally, I watch C-dramas to help alleviate the pain of living in a culture that mimics its entertainment.

This show had a very Western flavour to how the leads were behaving towards each other. They were not acting like emotionally mature adults, who understand and respect differences of opinion. GQF would get angry at Pan'er for the smallest thing and make it out like she was the problem or there was something wrong with how she saw things. He seemed controlling and I was disturbed by how casually the topic of him torturing people was handled. At times they seemed to be belittling each others' perspectives and he blamed Pan'er for how he felt at times. There's a difference between banter and shaming someone, this was the latter and it left a sour taste in my mouth. There's also a difference between honest vulnerability, and using honesty as an excuse to be a jerk and then hiding behind it when it begins to erode the trust in the relationship.

Everyone has different preferences, to some this is a desirable dynamic, for me I've had enough of this kind of dynamic for a lifetime.

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Will probably rewatch at some point (with caveats)

So I love C-dramas but the one thing I find is parts of it will be AMAZING but other parts are meh. For example I loved the story between Xuan Ji and Si Feng (except the end, WTF was that wedding night scene??), their love was so sweet and innocent. Meanwhile, from the moment Ling Long was introduced I knew I wouldn't like her as a character, I felt like I learned something from her arc but I would 100% skip her scenes if I watched again. And her and Min Yan? I was relieved when the storyline just sort of dropped out of existence.

I had a bit of a love-hate relationship with the show as well because of Bailing, listening to him gaslight and manipulate everyone made my blood boil. However it did have a satisfying payoff in the end . . . I just wish it hadn't been condoned by everyone but the Jade Emperor. Even though it made me angry to watch, the moral of the story is one I will never forget and for that reason it's one of my favourite watches to date. I've known a lot of people like Bailing, who are supposedly righteous, good people, yet they are the ones projecting so much hate and evil into the world. I can honestly say it changed me because I FELT something was off with these people, that they said one thing and did another, but it wasn't until I saw it in Bailing that I understood.

That's one of my favourite things about C-dramas, they explore a lot of moral and philosophical topics we honestly don't know exist in a culture heavily influenced by Christianity. In particular I found Si Feng's story moving, he's probably my favourite character of all time. I loved watching him go head-to-head with Bailing and others because you could tell he knew what was up, he's smart but he never rubbed it in.

Overall I genuinely think people should give this one a thorough watch, some of the tropes got a bit old but I didn't feel like it ever got boring enough to drop it. Besides, you can just turn Si Feng spitting blood into a drinking game. XD

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