My Stand-In: Uncut (2024)

What A Satisfying Ride!

I have seen dozens of BL shows, but the experience of watching My Stand In was top-tier. Whether it was watching it or turning to social media, My Stand In kept me in a 12-week choke hold. The way I felt about the characters in episode 1 was not how I felt about them at the end of episode 12. There was so much drama, but also so much character growth. I hated Ming at the beginning of the series but loved and wanted the world for him by the end.

I've watched many toxic romances, but what set Joe and Ming's story apart is that the viewer watches events happen and those events change the character. Relationships that began like the Manson Family ended like The Brady Bunch. Every turn and twist was earned and felt. The chemistry between the main couple is electric. Even as you wish they would stay away from each other you understood why they couldn't.

Action, sex, messy emotions... it's got it all. I highly recommend My Stand In to everyone, it's that good.

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had me until episode 4

(potential trigger warnings in my review, talking about abuse and intimate partner violence)

Overall: with a few tweaks this could have been a 9.5 series but I actively did not want the main leads together especially when 3 years later one of them was still a narcissist. It's sad but not surprising that people were victim blaming and calling Joe stupid. He wasn't stupid, he was an abuse victim (more below). Very similar aesthetics to KinnPorsche which made sense because it shared a director and screenwriter. It was adapted from the novel "Professional Body Double" by Shui Qiang Cheng which I didn't read and I based the series on its own merits. 12 episodes about an hour each. Aired uncut on iQIYI. First episode link: https://www.iq.com/play/my-stand-in-uncut-episode-1-1iwuiu9rlww?lang=en_us The production company also produced I Feel You Linger In The Air.

Content Warnings: death, grief, non con kissing, punch/violence, intimate partner abuse, held against will, gaslighting, manipulation, coercion, past suicide?, manhandling, vomiting, parental abuse, kidnapped, homophobia

What I Liked
- the premise
- showed a condom and discussed sexual position preferences
- had a good conversation at the beginning of episode 2
- wanting/ongoing physical affection in the beginning episodes
- sweet moments in the beginning episodes
- supportive sister
- production value (some really nice camera shots, use of mirrors, switching focus on foreground to background etc.)

Room For Improvement
- I can't root for their relationship as explained below
- Ming was stupid, he could have easily shown his dad evidence first before telling him the other part, he could have shored up his financial situation first as well
- Joe's lack of agency, he had a bunch of awful things and felt cornered into doing things instead of it being his choice
- multiple failed redemption arcs
- trash characters have no consequences, just instant forgiveness for terrible things they did
- multiple romances introduced in the last 30 minutes of the last episode
- voice overs with exposition dumps
- some of the music didn't fit the tone (that fight in episode 4 was made comical instead of dramatic)
- wish a character hadn't been shown as extremely drunk at the end of episode 1
- love triangle, Sol overstepped and took away agency from Joe especially in episode 9
- nonsense stuff i.e. Ming just happened to have something at his house in episode 4??? Joe didn't have any bruises/blood on his face/head in episode 4, Joe happened to overhear key conversations, 1 person being extremely drunk and a stunt person not being able to get away

Thoughts on Grey Characters/Their Romantic Relationships
Sometimes these characters and their dynamic work for me and other times they don't. Here are the factors that I think about:
1. was there a realistic reason why the character/s acted the way they did in the past (sort of, but not to the level that Ming was at)
2. how bad was/is the treatment (extremely abusive and violent, Ming could have accidentally killed Joe in episode 4, 3 years later and Ming stays a narcissist he says "I always get what I want" and he actively ignores what would make Joe happy)
3. were both characters grey or was one squeaky clean (Joe was mostly squeaky clean but unbelievably dense in not believing that Ming wanted him and Ming was abusive and a narcissist and stayed a narcissist/manipulative and also stupid to not know why Joe didn't tell him something)
4. was there some kind of apology/amend making (verbal apologies, promised to treat him better/give him job opportunities, was sweet with him but to me it was just the make up phase of an abuse cycle)
5. was there character growth (no, 3 years later and Ming was still a narcissist which was reinforced in episode 9, he made decisions involving Joe without asking what Joe wanted because Ming did whatever Ming wanted)
6. do I believe that the characters will stay together in a happy romantic relationship (no, because for Ming it was about power/control and not love)
final verdict: I didn't want them in a romantic relationship together

Joe wasn't stupid, he was the victim of intimate partner violence
- Joe was the victim of physical, financial, emotional/mental and sexual abuse
- Ming didn't love Joe, he wanted to control him to get what he wanted
- abuse survivors can have a very difficult time escaping the abuse because abusers can be extremely excellent manipulators "if you hadn't done abc then I wouldn't have had to say/do xyz", also there are periods of nice times that trick the survivor into thinking the abuser does love them (the make up phase in the cycle of abuse), in the real world intimate partner violence is deadly and widespread, it is estimated that 10-40% of law enforcement officers are abusers and they are frequently the first people to respond, it's all very terrible and not at all romantic

If you or someone you love needs help, here is a resource in the U.S. https://www.rainn.org/

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When Characters Cannot Change

This story had an interesting premise... a character (Joe) who is a stunt double and suffers an accident while doing a job he was forced to take due to the selfishness, stubbornness, stupidity and inaction from other characters (Tong, Ming, P'Wut, Sol). He somehow switches bodies and re-appears as the same Joe in another guy's body who is/was also named Joe. This is where the interesting part ends and the rest becomes an ode to masochism, a show dedicated to one flawed character after another and a show that had almost no redemption for any of them. In the end, the characters were so unlikable and even unbearable at times that it made for some excruciating final episodes... and here are all my reasons as to why I think that.

1. As I said before, the premise of the show is what got many people interested. The idea of a "stand-in" in a relationship was seen as a something "out of the box" in Thai BL's that have focused (ad nauseam) on high school/university students (mainly engineers and doctors), ghost stories, mafia or gangs, or innocuous juvenile romances in silly stories (see all my other reviews for many examples of these storylines).

So, as a result, we had Joe as a stand-in for stunt actions of famous actor Tong who manages to catch the eye of Ming. Tong is in a relationship with Ming's sister but Ming is secretly in love with Tong... who only uses both siblings to his advantage and never really shows any type of affection (physical or otherwise) to Ming. Unfortunately, Joe begins to fall in love for Ming but is ignored or rejected at first, only settling in a sexual relationship. Ming begins to see Joe as his personal "stand-in" as he uses Joe as a buffer for his feelings towards Tong.

Slowly, Ming begins to show his true colors as an obsessive, manipulative and controlling person who is a spoiled brat who does what he wants outside of his home as his parents are a nightmare to be with. He pushes Joe to the edge many times like when he confuses his name for Tong during a drunken moment or when he monitors Joe's whereabouts many times during the day or when he gets jealous for any simple thing or when he helps Tong boycott Joe from getting a decent job by kidnapping him before a press conference.

Joe suffers an accident due to faulty equipment in a shady production and is lost for years. Fast forward, he wakes up in another guy's body (also named Joe) and the cycle repeats until the end of the show when Joe and Ming end up together.

2. The characters have to be the most flawed ensemble I've seen in a show. Normally, you get one maybe two in a BL series but this time we get ALL of them.
a. Joe is naïve and a masochist. He loves Ming and despite all the things he goes through because of him, he is so blinded by love that he always comes back. He even tells Ming's father in episode 12 that "without Ming, he wouldn't know what he'll be living for" (wtf?!). The character became annoying due to his dull responses to everything that Ming put him through. Is like Joe enjoys all the mental abuse due to his love of Ming.
b. Ming is garbage... plain and simple. He is immature, spoiled, obsessive, manipulative, stubborn, selfish, rude, insecure, overbearing, violent, and a long long etcetera. He has no redeeming quality and even his apology to Joe in episode 12 "for everything he did to him" sounded fake.
c. Sol is selfish and dumb. He confesses to Ming in episode 12 that he was shocked when Joe told him he was gay and he left for South Korea because he felt Joe was trying to take advantage of him (another wtf moment!). Considering Joe's personality, Sol was simply an idiot, especially when he realizes that he actually misses Joe and likes him. He kept trying to make Joe understand that Ming was not good for him but to no avail.
d. P'Wut is dumber. He is Joe's manager but aside from a few weak attempts to protect Joe, he never really imposes himself as the adult and he just allows Ming, Joe, Tong and Sol to go right over him.
e. Mike (Ming's brother) is a bully. He has a weird mentality of wanting to help Ming but also trying to force Joe to leave him because they are not suitable for each other. He doesn't appear much in the show but he brought a weird aura to the scenes all the time he was there.
f. Tong is a leech. He marries Ming's sister and then gets her pregnant but he is only with her for the money. He has gambling debts and wants her and Ming to help. He knows Ming has a crush on him and exploits that crush to get him to do whatever he wants and only changes when he is threatened by Ming's father and brother. Even Joe ends up helping him in the final 2 episodes despite being one of the culprits of the original Joe's death.
g. Ming's parents are controlling and manipulative but we learn in episode 12 that Ming's father is just afraid of losing his son and Ming's mother is unable to communicate with him effectively. So, they seek and get minor redemption for their actions, but it's too little too late.
h. Secretary Jim just does whatever he is told to do and ends up in an apparent relationship with Mike in episode 12.
i. The other Joe is a mystery... we know he tried to commit suicide after he came out to his mother... she talks to Ming's mother about it in episode 12, but aside from that, his real image barely appears on the show and we know nothing about his background or life.

3. Some things never get a proper explanation
a. Why does the original Joe end up taking over the other Joe's body? There is no connection between the characters other than both are gay and have the same name.
b. What happened to the other Joe's soul? Original Joe takes over his body and original Joe's body is found and then cremated... so other Joe's soul is just gone?
c. What is the role of the blind master in all of this? He helps Ming in the process of finding Joe and also appears in Joe's mind in episodes 11 and 12 to help him decide whether to return or to die.
d. In that sequence, he reveals that because Joe decided on his own to stay with Ming and live, then the cycle of suffering as a "stand-in" has been broken. That seems a bit ridiculous.
e. Why the actor playing other Joe (Winner) barely appears in the show? If original Joe has taken over his body but everybody sees other Joe... why he has so little time on screen?

In the end, Poom's acting (as original Joe) is one of the best things of the show as he portrays his character's emotions effectively. So that is the only positive of this series, because as I said before, this show ended up being an ode to masochism with a lead character who just could not stay away from pain, abuse and suffering because of love.

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i still hate tong

I absolutely loved this series. Was it full of drama and toxic? most definitely. However each character executed their roles perfectly.

Abusive situations end differently for everyone. You absolutely do not need to forgive your abuser, however Joe decided that he wanted to. Should he have taken more time for himself to think? Absolutely but we don’t live in a perfect world.

Ming was a narcissist and verbally/emotionally abusive to Joe and did not have much of a personality change in 2 years. We did however see flashes of a different side of him after Joe died, he was extremely sad and remorseful.

Throughout the year of knowing new Joe it was shown that he didn’t change much at all until Joe finally revealed who he was. He then started the process trying to make things better. I believe that he made a good first step towards it and the last two episodes solidified that.

I 100% believe that Ming will be making it up to Joe for the rest of their lives.

Can an abuser actually show remorse? I think it depends on the situation. In this case yes but he would have to work for it, which he has been doing. The apology made this even more true imo.

I think a lot of people who hate these themes of BL want everyone to leave a toxic situation and be done but that’s not how it works all the time. You can call it gullible, stupid, cornered, whatever you want to use but ultimately the choice is the abused.

Anyways i still hate Tong there’s no redeeming him in my eyes 🤣 but if you want to watch give the show a chance! x

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an absolute feast of dramatic acting

My Stand In occupied my top slot of QL shows for... probably 10 or 11 weeks straight. I truly loved the novelty of getting to sink my teeth into some really excellent dramatic acting and well developed character beats. While I appreciate the fast-paced and tongue-in-cheek BLs, it was a lovely change of pace to really sit and let the mood develop properly. The cinematography and production were likewise top-notch, for a visually stunning series. Though the story had some minor faults, it was hardly enough to put a dent in the quality of this show. I look forward to dragging my only-when-the-show-is-finished watcher friends down with me again soon, because I am already missing this world.

-The Full Review-

STORY:
The best of this story was by far Ming and Joe. The relationship between these two characters was natural, real, and evocative. My Stand In was at it's absolute strongest in developing the push and pull between these characters and the believable stresses and reconciliations. Joe, by virtue of his goodness, could have been a largely static character, but his iron will really shaped him into a dimensional and human creature. Ming, of course, was an incredibly thorough character arc.
Within these two characters, the show left time for some truly gorgeous, long beats. The stand out among these scenes would have to be the funeral--occupying more than half of the episode, there was no rush. The audience was allowed to be steeped in the issues these characters are facing and feel the full force of the turmoil. It was some really, really wonderful writing.
That said, the other characters definitely suffered for Joe and Ming's spotlight. While some of the supporting roles--namely Sol, Wut, and Joe's mom--received full characterizations and properly motivated actions, some of the other minor characters changed alliances rather conveniently. It wasn't atrocious--but it does speak to some pacing issues and lack of development within the wider world.
I also found the ending to be a bit sweet for my tastes. While I enjoy a happy ending (and have no issue with My Stand In having a happy ending) the speed at which major issues between characters was resolved lost some of the weight of the earlier episodes and made the reconciliations feel a bit cheap. I'm not sure that I was entirely sold on the change in tone.

ACTING:
Well, first things: Up is a truly remarkable actor. I didn't know anything about him going in, and now I'm planning to watch... everything he's ever done. Ming isn't an easy task-- whiny and childish, but with a depth and charm that needs to shine through even at his most selfish. Up made moving between his tantrums and cruelties, and his playful, loving nature seem easy and natural. I especially enjoyed the way the weight of Ming's grief changed his posture in the later part of the series. It was really a joy to watch.
Of course, Poom is an equally excellent talent. I've heard a lot of comments about his downturned smile, but I actually found the most power in the set of his jaw. There's a moment I keep rewatching where Ming goes to kiss Joe and Joe is quite angry with him but has his reasons for acquiescing... and the clarity with which Poom conveys his entire emotional journey in that moment with no dialogue is quite beautiful. He's very precise in the performance he delivers.
Beyond the leads, I really enjoyed Paradorn as Wut. It's not often that middle aged adults get to have a nuanced and meaningful relationship with the young leads, and I really enjoyed how his performance wove between fatherly and friendly. Billy, Porsche, and Lotte are obviously newer talents, but similarly convey some compelling and promising performances. I'm quite interested to see what they do next.

PRODUCTION:
This team is absolutely dominant in the BL industry for beautiful and thoughtful production. Lighting, costumes, makeup, set design, cinematography, and sound were all absolutely impeccable. It is absolutely stunning to watch and I will happily follow anything this team does next. I hope they work together for a very long time.
I loved the costuming of this series, it felt very specific. The clothing choices were natural... but heightened. You could feel Ming and his families wealth, as well as the presence of celebrity. It contrasted with Joe's more mundane tastes very well and created a sense of separation and difference.
It was very interesting how the lighting team used such a warm palette but still managed to make the appropriate scenes feel sinister and cold. The atmosphere of Joe's house--and especially the outdoor lamps--created a central mood and heart to the series that was never lost throughout.
If I had to pick a favorite though, it might be set design. The color palettes and shapes of large objects in the rooms connected several disparate locations and created throw backs to unexpected moods. My personal favorite by far was the way in which Joe's room was made to feel like the room he was held captive in--perfectly capturing how trapped he felt in his current life.

INTIMACY:
This was quite fun! I thought the actors did a wonderful job of capturing the magnetic chemistry between the characters while also still giving their relationship space to grow. In both casual and NC encounters, early on Ming and Joe carry some awkwardness. They don't quite match properly, and the scenes can feel rushed or uncomfortable (even if they still express desire and satisfaction). As the characters grow closer and come to an understanding, those rough edges smooth out to something more romantic and easy. I liked it a lot!
I also simply HAVE to give a nod to the scene directly following Ming admitting he's afraid of Joe disappearing. The way Up and Poom developed the intimacy in that moment without any conventional touches or kisses was fragile and beautiful. The production allowing this moment to go on so long was absolutely the right choice and truly cemented the course of the series.

In all, I really, really enjoyed My Stand In. I absolutely recommend it and eagerly await what this team can bring next--either together or in their separate pursuits.

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Love is better the second time around?

I started watching this last night and did not stop until now: so no sleep for the wicked (me!)! Actually, I was not going to binge watch it but I had some things on my mind and I could not sleep so I kept hitting the next episode button.

What a ride it was! Beautifully filmed and acted, fast paced and interesting except for the last, filler episode! But more about that later! The synopsis here is a bit messy, to be frank and in spite of reading it few times, some things became clear only when I watched them.

The story follows Jo, a stuntman who meets and falls in love with a rich and spoilt brat Ming. But that turns eventually into a disaster and Jo gets killed during a film shoot. His soul is somehow transferred into the body of another man, a model called Jo as well. He meets Ming again and the whole cycle of lies and abuse starts again. Will the issue be different the second time around?

What I liked:
- adult characters doing adult jobs and behaving like adults
- background music: there were some interesting musical choices I liked a lot (violins and piano but so different from the usual fare)
- pretty sets and cinematograph: I loved those shots of two birds on a wire (electric/telephone posts?!?)
- no sponge baths, not even one: I was pleasantly surprised when I realized that!
- soul exchange mechanism as explained by the blind Master: Jo the model wanted to die after his huge row with his mother. Jo the stuntmen did not want to give up even when falling down the cliff. Heaven decided to exchange their souls and eventually gave Jo another chance to chose because he had a strong will to live
- side characters: Mike and Jim, funny, smart and overflowing with chemistry!
- role reversal: seme/uke, two semes. Jo is a seme and Ming looks like an uke but prefers to be a seme so Jo lets him and eventually really becomes an uke (carries a purse!) even though he is dressed like a seme. This is the first time I see this role distribution in a very coded bl world. Refreshing!
- the character of Ming: a cocky, self-centred and egoistical rich young man who is convinced he can get anything if he demands it while actually hiding deep insecurities behind this bravado and power attitude brought on by his money.
- Jo's character growth: he turns from a naive young man with stars in his eyes to an experienced adult who is not to be taken lightly.

What I did not like:
- actor playing Ming! The character is supposed to be the youngest son but he seems the oldest which was very confusing. this role was miscast.
- Mek's bad acting. It does not help his case either, that he looks as if he were Khaotung's twin brother with the same talent(none!) and expressivnes(OTT grimacing)...
- Jo's toothpaste smile: I was squinting every time his face was in close up. He is beautiful and a very talented actor but those shiny teeth....
- minimal chemistry between them even though they obviously gave it their all: I could not feel it
- Sol, the idol: how is that even possible? He is not pretty nor talented and cannot sing to save his life....
- Sol's hair. And everyone else's perfect hairstyles when they woke up: especially Ming in hospital!
- some boring funky songs with the obligatory a cappella beginning in crucial love scenes
- loan sharks with turbans and jellabas: are they muslims? I don't really care but it was weird to see!
- cliché Moms: the poor Mom is overweight while the rich one is slim
- the last episode! The final conflict was resolved in the first 5 min and the rest was just pure boring fluff!
- we get to see very little of the model Jo's appearance(only in mirrors) since the whole story was told from the point of view of Jo the stuntman (the narrator!). It would have been interesting to see the chemistry, if any
- Ming is a lovely toxic character in a lovely toxic relationship but who gets a sudden and unconvincing growth!

In conclusion: one of the better thai bls in a long time, worth the watch!

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Not an redemption arc!

While I am happy that "Up" had a chance to play a different character (and we all did really hate him), I'm disapointed in the story. Ming understands what he did was wrong, but he did not change his character that much. I can believe that he now really tries hard to be a better partner, but we have no idea if his control and power issues has been dealt with and I doubt it.
There were scenes where he was lying on the floor not eating, just drinking and not doing much, but this did not help to change his narcisistic flaws which are still present in the finale. I guess the screenwriter are contradicting the character because they wanted an redemption arc.

I also would have wished, they used "Winner" for the first part of the show and only "Poom" for the second half. This would of course complicated filming, because both actors would have to learn the same mannerisms for their characters which would have made the story more interesting and the immersion in the story more believeable. That the same person plays both characters irked me a bit.

I'm not happy with Mings character development and the same for Joe. Joe is always Joe not standing up for himself, not understanding when to say no. I can understand you love whom you love but there should be a moment when your brain says "enough is enough!". This show had so much potential, the first four episodes had me hooked and I thought about how they will solve the redemption. And because of the lack of a real redemption arc this show fails. For me the finale was especially lackluster because everyone is now "happy", all is good and even Mike got Mings secretary as future BF (They should have expanded that arc as well), because most of the later episodes is a repeat of the first ones without the violence and lack of self-reflection on Mings part but he forces Joe once again repeating the same mistake again.

So overall the show is still above average even when the story-writing falls of a cliff. It did at least try to do something different in the sea of average shows, it did try to give us a mature story in the sea of university settings. And Up as Ming was really great!

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Love is Blind

I didn't know anything about this show until I saw the Official Poster on Twitter even though I follow so many thai drama fan pages. And the poster, yes two man posing behind a couch on caught my attention instantly. From that exact moment I knew there is something odd about this poster, it's not that simple as it seems, and guess what I was right!


I read the synopsis and I didn't understand even a single thing, I was like so there is a guy Joe who gets into an accident and he wakes up in another man's body whose name in also Joe! I was confused as hell, that even after watching the trailer I couldn't understand anything. After watching the first episode finally my all confusions were cleared. In simple words this is a love story but love stories aren't always a dreamy one.


I know up since "Lovely Writer" era, I always liked him. Up is a great actor and already had proved it multiple times even before My Stand In but most of the people were blind not to notice it. I feel nobody else could play the role of Ming as Up did, he literally bring out the emotions of that character on the screen that audiences can feel it. Ming was only 20 years old when he first met Joe and he was even younger when he fall in long with Tong. A lonely person, who has no friends, doesn't show his love or feelings to anyone fall in love with a guy. Is society gonna accept it? But his family never will! Ming did questionable things throughout the whole drama, everyone hates him, I did too. We didn't know anything about Ming's past or his story. Why did he even fall in love with Tong. In the first few episodes, I was disgusted with Ming because to me he was a guy who loves his sister's boyfriend secretly, obsessed with Tong's back and used an innocent man's emotions for his own pleasure. So now tell me who wouldn't hate him. But Ming is guy who is in love, his pain after losing Joe, the way he kept waiting for him, the way he was ready to die for him made me realise that I can't hate Ming. Ming is a red flag, rich bitch, total asshole but his love for Joe was bigger than all those things.

MING IS A CHARACTER WHO IS EASY TO HATE BUT HARD TO FORGET.

This was my first time watching Poom and he literally stole everyone's heart. Poom as Joe was everything, he was a sunshine. Joe is kind, honest, lovely, respects everyone, even though he is an orphan he managed to be the best person ever. Anybody will love Joe as a person. But he makes stupid decision sometimes T_T


TONG is and will be one of the most hated characters in the history of BL. Like I wanted to kill him so many times. Mek Jirakit, a former GMMTV artist finally could shine again after leaving gmmtv. Mek is a good actor but since 2017 GMMTV never gave Mek any big roles or cast him in their biggest projects. Mek was villain in Angel Beside Me too, and he acts better as a villain. Mek personally enjoyed working in this drama also loved all the fame and hate he got!

All other supporting characters are also good. I didn't find Sol annoying, it's just that he realised his feelings for Joe very late. Wut is so smart and thoughtful, I liked this character too. I feel bad for May that she fall in love with a guy with Tong. Ming's big brother Mike is hot af. I don't like Joe 2.0 at all.

I liked the fact that they showed the backstory in the first few episodes not in the middle or past present past present kinda thing, because it makes the audience understand the story better. They did a good job with the cinematography, I really like Joe's house. Up and Poom literally killed it. They were on fire. The acting was awesome, like people can't complain about at all.


ONE THING I DIDN'T LIKE ONE THING that Joe was trapped in someone's body. I know the whole story is about this but Joe deserves happiness in his own body, he was treated like a replacement or a stand in throughout his whole life. And he being trapped in Joe 2.0 body till the end, getting success and love, all is scam. In the end Joe was, is and will be a stand in for the rest of his life.

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The Romanticized Ending of an Abusive Relationship

(Note: Spoilers below, TW for mention of interpersonal abuse, including SA)

First and foremost, Up and Poom were phenomenal in this series. Their acting was fantastic. I have a lost of criticism of the storyline and characters but want to make sure it's understood that these are not critiques of the actors themselves. I thought the production value was extremely high; the directing, costuming, lighting, makeup, stunts, etc. were all really high quality and fantastic.

I have neither read the novel this series is based on, nor have I investigated thorough summaries/reviews of it to try to draw comparisons. My review is entirely about the series.

In many ways, this is a very realistic portrayal of an abusive relationship from start to finish. Yes, the story involves the fantastical elements of body swapping and a shaman/mystic, but if you removed that you have a pretty stark portrayal of the push and pull of an abusive relationship. Knowing what I do about interpersonal violence, the end of the series feels only like a pause, not like a happy ending as many view it.

Joe is a man starved for love. He lost his parents when he was very young and has been on his own. He has friends and has clearly had relationships before, but he is desperate for someone to choose him and stay with him. This is what leads him to initially accepting a sex-only arrangement with Ming, despite that not being what he wanted. He would settle for whatever crumbles he could get rather than knowing his own worth and standing firm on deserving better.

Once Ming had him hooked the abuse began. We see his intense manipulation and controlling nature almost immediately. We see multiple instances of Joe saying no to sex but Ming persisting until Joe gives up and gives in (this is NOT consent!). We see Joe be physically harmed when Ming's anger over his own jealousy or not getting his way is taken out either on Joe directly or indirectly because Joe is trying to break up the violence. Of course, there is the obvious kidnapping and holding him prisoner until Joe manages to get away. After the body swap we add using money to manipulate and control Joe into doing what Ming wants. Ming consistently ignores what Joe wants or what would make him happy. The only thing that ever matters is Ming getting what Ming wants.

People will make a lot of excuses for Ming. Oh Ming was abused; he was groomed; he was neglected. It doesn't matter. Was Ming being emotionally manipulated by Tong? Yes. Was he a victim of Tong's controlling tendencies when he felt threatened or jealous by Ming not focusing entirely on him? Yes. Was his family emotionally neglectful? Yes. Was his family controlling either directly or indirectly? Yes. Did all of these contribute to Ming's behavior? Surely. However being abused is not a valid excuse to become the abuser.

What angers me the most is the way Joe is constantly manipulated back into Ming's arm's every time he tries to get away. He breaks up with Ming after the kidnapping but Ming states he refuses to leave Joe's home. He will stay there and force Joe to face the man who has wrought so much abuse upon him and who has destroyed the opportunity and career he had earned for himself. Joe never has to face him only because of his "death." When Joe wakes up in the body of another he wants nothing but to avoid Ming and move on, to have a different path. However, his need for money to help the mother of his new body who he has taken as his own puts him into a difficult situation. Ming leverages this to get what he wants, a stand-in for his previous stand-in. When Ming discovers who new Joe really is Joe, once again, tries to leave him but is once again forced back because Ming simply won't take no for an answer.

Only when Ming gets confirmation that new Joe is actually old Joe does he start the conciliatory phases of the abuse cycle (remorse and honeymoon phases). He inserts himself in Joe's life even when Joe doesn't want him to. He decides to be sweet. Suddenly he is kind to Joe. Does he ever apologize for his own abuse toward him? No. Does he make any real effort to do better? Some would say yes but to me this looks like placating.

Even when Joe is dying and decides to die (putting aside whether or not the master may have persuaded/manipulated him into that choice), it is only the emotional manipulation of Ming that changes his mind.

One could argue that Joe made these decisions on his own, fully knowing what he was doing. However the person who makes that argument doesn't understand the cycle of abuse. It starts with the honeymoon phase where one is showered with affection, gifts, compliments, etc. Then the abuser becomes moody, criticizing, threatening, playing mind games and/or gaslighting. Next they explode, this is where the physical, sexual and emotional abuse comes in. After there are excuses, guilt, justification ("you're only a stand-in," or the reminders their relationship is only a sexual one). Then we go right back into our honeymoon phase. Joe never sees Ming's abuse as being Ming's fault. It's his own because he wants more than he's entitled to as a mere sex partner, because he was with Sol who he knows Ming doesn't like, because he upset Tong who is important to Ming, etc. etc. Joe keeps going back because of the hope that it will be different, it will be the honeymoon phase all the time. In fact, we even see a honeymoon phase montage early in episode 12 leading up to the decision not to exit the mortal plane.

Joe never once was allowed to make a decision for himself once he met Ming, and every time he tried to Ming was there to usurp control of his decision making. This series is a beautifully tragic portrait of abuse. However, it is the clear intention that we are supposed to cheer on this couple, supposed to want them together and supposed to excuse all that abuse because the abuser is suddenly being kind which causes me to rate it so low.

There are other things I could nitpick, namely the lack of use of Winner and how it would have worked much better for Winner to play Joe's original body and have Poom play the new Joe with the glimpses of Winner we got instead being glimpses of the soul inside the body rather than being reminders of who everyone else saw. We never get to see the synergy between Winner and Poom's performances because Winner practically doesn't exist. The really missed the opportunity there to make the audience adjust to the new Joe along with the characters.

In the end, this series constantly made me angry and it should have. If you weren't angry at the abuse; f you weren't constantly hoping Joe would get away from Ming; if you weren't irate that Tong and Ming both got off without any consequences for their myriad shitty behavior; if you didn't think that in a fictional world we deserved a better ending for Joe then I don't know. This series was beautiful aesthetically with brilliant acting, but it was a horrible tragedy through and through.

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Amazing, unique storyline

The story is so interesting and entertaining. Emotional damage in every episode, but it was so worth it. The acting was top tier, the chemistry was amazing, the character depth was there, the spicy scenes were well done. Ming *was* a red flag but he was so well-written and you could really understand his position as the series progressed. I felt like the actor for Tong was a bit weak, but otherwise a top tier show. So worth watching. I especially loved Poom as Joe. Pepsi also once again did a great job as a director.
My only real criticism is how they wrapped up the plot in episode 12. The ending felt weak, with all conflict resolved very fast and not incredibly logically. But given the rest of this amazing show, I am so willing to excuse this weak point.

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